Mom, I’m Gay | Teen Ink

Mom, I’m Gay MAG

By Anonymous

     I remember that day when I proudly stated, “Mom, I’m gay.” I felt liberated - until I realized that she wanted to push me out of the car. Liberation, all right. Good thing I wasn’t liberated from my seat belt.

I’ve always been one to test the waters. Sometimes the outcome is good, like admitting I’m gay, and sometimes the outcome is tragic, like that haircut in third grade.

I decided to tell her that night because she was mad at me already. Yes, and my parents call me the smart child. I felt the need to test the limits again. Besides, how much deeper could I dig myself?

Well, it turns out, pretty far.

“Mom, I’m gay.”

The car swerved to the left. Honk. Then to the right. Beep. As she straightened out, I realized I had just blabbed the secret of a lifetime; some people keep this inside their whole lives while I blurted it out on a car ride to my therapist’s office.

“No, you’re not.”

“Yes, I am,” I responded, just for the sake of contradicting her. “Look, I’m going out on a limb to tell you. It’s not easy for me.” Well, there it was. It just came out. Once I got going, it was pretty easy.

“I just want you to be normal. Don’t you want to be normal?”

“I do! This has nothing to do with being normal!” An argument. Things were getting interesting.

“Then fix it. Don’t be gay!”

Oh, if I could have screamed, I would have! Fix it? There’s nothing to be fixed! Toilets need to be fixed! My sexuality? Nope! Being gay isn’t something I could do anything about. I was mad, so I huffed and puffed in silence as she drove, white-knuckled, down the highway.

At the therapist’s office, I bawled about how unlucky I was to have a mother who lacked understanding, was uncaring and was a bad driver. The therapist called my mom in, saying the three of us needed to talk. I sensed a fiasco.

Mom walked in with a fake smile. I wanted to tell her to wipe it off, but that wasn’t what we were here for. She sat next to me and I started analyzing her every move. Okay, she sat down next to me. That’s good. Extra long blink. Not good. She doesn’t even want to look at me. She’s shifting in her seat. She’s uncomfortable. Or maybe she’s trying to get closer to me. Or farther away.

“Hello? Earth to you, dear.”

“Umm.” Perfect. I felt like an idiot. My therapist was being paid huge amounts of money to hear me say umm and analyze my mother’s every move? I was so busy looking at my mom that I’d completely missed what my therapist had been saying.

“I think you know that Mom loves you no matter what. And Mom, this isn’t an attention thing. I’ve known this for a while. It’s no big secret.” Well, not anymore!

We went home that evening pretending nothing had happened. I was careful not to distract my mother.

And today? Well, we’re getting along. I’ve learned to love the fact that I like girls and am secure in my sexuality, I’ve been able to tell other people. I’m not ashamed anymore. It’s who I am. Just like I’ll always mismatch my socks, I’ll always have a weakness for underwear shopping and hazelnut coffee, and I’ll always like girls. My mother may not exactly love it, but she can deal. But just wait until I bring home my first girlfriend!

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This article has 195 comments.

on Sep. 14 2022 at 3:04 am
GayGabrielSus, Svendborg, Hawaii
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment
AYOOOOOOOOOOOoooo thats kinda sus i like it

on Jul. 4 2021 at 8:54 am
CrazyCatLady6 GOLD, New Radnor, Other
16 articles 0 photos 102 comments

Favorite Quote:
"There would be no shadows if the sun were not shining"

well done! I remember telling my dad in the car that i was bi... Only he thought it was 4 attention 2 bc I was 9.... 4 years later... Yep still bi dad.
(He's ok with it... but I don't think my mum remembers me telling her... oops!)

366275 said...
on Jan. 7 2021 at 2:53 pm
366275, Virginia Beach, Virginia
0 articles 0 photos 3 comments
I'm telling you, I know what this feels like. My mom said the exact same thing when I told her that I like girls. Then again, my mom is a very religious woman, so I kind of knew what lecture I was getting into. She still doesn't fully comprehend that I like girls, or, as a matter of fact, LOVE girls.

on Jan. 5 2020 at 9:36 pm
Beanmint23 BRONZE, Regina, Saskatchewan
1 article 0 photos 5 comments
You are very brave for coming out to your mom!

MA BRONZE said...
on Sep. 23 2018 at 5:31 pm
MA BRONZE, Midvale, Utah
4 articles 1 photo 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
If life shuts one door, open another, or you could open the closed door. That's how doors work.

This is amazing. The best way I've heard someone come out. Good job on being so brave.

on Nov. 14 2017 at 7:53 pm
WinterSunSummerSnow SILVER, Miami, Florida
9 articles 2 photos 5 comments

Favorite Quote:
I mean what I think, I don't think what I say.

Great for you! That's the most savage confession I've ever read.

on Dec. 6 2016 at 8:16 pm
adxastra PLATINUM, North Ogden, Utah
23 articles 1 photo 5 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Even if you cant make the pancake you can still be the pancake. The pancake is inside of you."

-Gerard Way

This is amazing, and quite similar to my experience coming out.

looloo said...
on Oct. 6 2015 at 3:39 am
Communicates the feeling very well - quite moving

TimR. PLATINUM said...
on Mar. 30 2015 at 8:58 am
TimR. PLATINUM, Allentown, New York
34 articles 0 photos 11 comments
Awesome! Im glad one of us is doing great! Good for you! :)

on May. 15 2014 at 11:23 pm
TierraJunebug SILVER, Wixom, Michigan
8 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
Be the change that you want to see in the world

I like hazelnut coffee and underwear shopping tooooo , but im bisexual , its amazing how a person like myself can feel so alone like no one understands , then realize that youre not alone

on May. 15 2014 at 11:21 pm
TierraJunebug SILVER, Wixom, Michigan
8 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
Be the change that you want to see in the world

good for you! she needed to know , and whether or not she approves is not whats important , your happiness does matter though and it sounds like you are happy now that you got that out of the way.

on Mar. 11 2014 at 2:44 pm
Mister_J PLATINUM, Colorado Springs, Colorado
42 articles 3 photos 17 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Captain, I wish to report a mutiny. I can name fingers and point names." - Captain Jack Sparrow

I want to honestly congratulate you on your decision. I have homosexual cousins, and reading your work just made me feel so shocked at the reaction of your mother. Well done!

Alycia. BRONZE said...
on Jan. 1 2014 at 11:53 am
Alycia. BRONZE, Lower Gwynedd, Pennsylvania
4 articles 8 photos 41 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Our lives are not our own. We are bound to others, past and present, and by each crime and every kindness, we birth our future.” -- David Mitchell, Cloud Atlas

I love the positive tone and the humor in the last paragraph. This article is amazing, well-written, and really grabs the reader and puts them in your shoes. Well done.

on Dec. 23 2013 at 3:49 pm
risakonis0 BRONZE, Summerfield, North Carolina
3 articles 1 photo 1 comment
Total cold chills! Fave article I've read on here!!! 

Merla said...
on Sep. 11 2013 at 10:20 am
Merla, Reykjavík, Other
0 articles 0 photos 6 comments
I like how this article was funny, even though the situation was pretty serious. The humour wasn’t forced, he was just there and made the article an enjoyable read. But I really hope your mother comes to term with your sexuality, it shouldn’t be a thing you’re ashamed of. Also, I sincerely hope you do write about it when you bring your first girlfriend home…  

on Jul. 13 2013 at 7:45 pm
transparantspirit434 PLATINUM, Farmington, New Mexico
40 articles 0 photos 40 comments

Favorite Quote:
I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee. -Hebrews 13:5

Okay, so I know that this story has 179 comments and mine is going to get lost in the never-ending pool of these, but... that was so brave of you. And I really enjoyed reading it. That is all. Keep it up!

on Jun. 28 2013 at 8:43 am
GleekGamer PLATINUM, Somerset, New Jersey
28 articles 1 photo 34 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Friendship isn't always easy, but there's no doubt it's worth fighting for."

Love it. Fantastic and brave.

on May. 26 2013 at 9:18 am
Mirooney BRONZE, Hooksett, New Hampshire
2 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
Death is but Crossing the World, as Friends do the Seas; They live in one another still.
132. For they must needs be present, that love and live in that which is Omnipresent.
133. In this Divine Glass, they see Face to Face; and their Converse is Free, as well as Pure.
134. This is the Comfort of Friends, that though they may be said to Die, yet their Friendship and Society are, in the best Sense, ever present, because Immortal.

you must be very brave for doing this!

on May. 25 2013 at 11:10 am
Loki@221B BRONZE, Newtown, Pennsylvania
3 articles 0 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity."
-Edgar Allan Poe

I admire you! Kudos! Haha, you and I sound so similar! We're both lesbian, obsessed with hazlenut coffee and underwear shopping, and seeing therapists! Keep yourself and your coffee strong <333

on May. 21 2013 at 2:55 pm
Kregory_James_III BRONZE, Seymour, Missouri
2 articles 3 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Life is like the legend of the Phoenix, all beginnings start with an end."

Great article! i remeber when I told my parents I was gay, it was nerve racking. I admire your courage.