Monster | Teen Ink

Monster

September 11, 2009
By Meago GOLD, Spring City, Tennessee
Meago GOLD, Spring City, Tennessee
17 articles 2 photos 83 comments

Favorite Quote:
How come when you need something the most- that's the time when you have to fight the hardest to receive it?


As I'm sitting here, in this box-shaped room, staring at my prey three feet away from me, I am anxious. This child, an innocent child, will die. She is nothing to me, nothing at all. When she wakes, only then will she notice my presence. She is sleeping calmly, probably dreaming sweet childish fantasies of blue skies and purple unicorns flying to see a magical princess. Little does she know that in a few short hours her rosey red complexion will fade away to meet a dull white color. Little does she know that the curls that surround her face will fade and cover a life-less dull face. Little does she know of her radiant blue eyes fading with the sunset. Unlike the sun, her eyes will never surface again.

~Little does she know of the monster I am~


The author's comments:
This was written for my creative writing class. Let's just say the teacher was a little worred.

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This article has 205 comments.


on Nov. 30 2011 at 3:10 pm
BibliophileFreak BRONZE, Deatsville, Alabama
3 articles 0 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
A kiss makes the heart young again and wipes out the years.
-Rupert Brooke

I like this. I like a little crazy in my bowl of Capn' Crunch!

on Nov. 30 2011 at 2:28 pm
Overkill SILVER, Gallup, New Mexico
6 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
Killing Perfection
The secret to sucess is constancy of purpose

This is really good! I like the darkness but crazy people are the most fasacinating of us all! Why crazy people are the more fun!

Ekf07 GOLD said...
on Nov. 23 2011 at 9:17 pm
Ekf07 GOLD, Huntersville, North Carolina
16 articles 0 photos 27 comments

Favorite Quote:
“The expert at anything was once a beginner.All writers are crazy. So never mind what the editors, your family and your critique group tells you. Submit your manuscripts and keep submitting until you get an offer. Then you can be crazy, with a payc

what kind of monster.....lol

intresting.  this is an intresting pov.

i can see why the teacher was worried. LOL


on Nov. 23 2011 at 11:04 am
Belluna45 PLATINUM, Shelbyville, Kentucky
31 articles 0 photos 58 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Look after my heart- I've left it with you."
-Stephenie Meyer (Eclipse (Twilight #3))
"Either write something worth reading or do something wor
th writing."
-Benjamin Franklin
"A dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest."
-Johnny Depp

This is really cool I like how the character talks about her pray and how she's monster.

on Nov. 17 2011 at 2:02 pm
Savannalore SILVER, North Branch, South Dakota
9 articles 17 photos 121 comments

Favorite Quote:
Art is all about mistakes and knowing which ones to keep.

This is the third time I've read this piece, and it still seems to me like the "monster" is trying to convince herself if her own cruelty. She says the girl doesn't mean anything to her, but I think she's someone different than how she portrays herself to be.

on Nov. 16 2011 at 6:38 am
welcometoplanetearth SILVER, Devon, Pennsylvania
9 articles 2 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
There are three rules for writing the novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are.
-W. Somerset Maugham

Very dark and riveting... proves that even short pieces can be exciting! 

GaelicC said...
on Nov. 12 2011 at 3:28 am
GaelicC, Longford, Other
0 articles 0 photos 91 comments

Favorite Quote:
No -Rosa Parks

To be honest i never knew such a short piece could be so good, so powerful! Brilliant!:)

on Nov. 11 2011 at 9:13 pm
LifesIllusion BRONZE, Cicero, Indiana
4 articles 0 photos 127 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Don't let your fears slow you down. Instead, chase them down and beat them."

Loved it! i especially like your writing stlye. Check out my work? thanks!

on Nov. 11 2011 at 3:41 pm
very nicee:) sounds like the same kind of thing i would write similar to my style

on Nov. 11 2011 at 1:20 pm
Gumballlover BRONZE, Homer, New York
3 articles 0 photos 39 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The things that may come may not be beautiful, they may not be perfect. But they're for you. HAVE FAITH"

This touched me. It is an awesome writing piece. 

on Nov. 10 2011 at 5:26 pm
Eliahumandoglover SILVER, San Francisco, California
5 articles 0 photos 29 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Don't say the old lady screamed. Bring her on and let her scream." --Mark Twain "Being tactful is saying someone is open-minded when they have a hole in their head."by???

 I like how you write the piece from the villain's point of view. I could almost feel the mosnter about to the suck the baby's blood or something.

on Nov. 4 2011 at 9:54 pm
Crazymexican GOLD, Jay, Maine
12 articles 0 photos 30 comments

Favorite Quote:
not sure

I like this. Teachers worried? Maybe because your a better writer

on Oct. 29 2011 at 1:18 pm
-OathKeeper- BRONZE, Baltimore, Maryland
2 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You Don't Know What Control Is... Until You Lose It."

This was sublime. You leave a lot to the imagination and do it correctly at that. There are so many meaning behind this that once can draw out, so many differnt turns and twists to imagine in ones mind. Very interesting.

TaurusGal GOLD said...
on Oct. 28 2011 at 11:17 pm
TaurusGal GOLD, Hong Kong, Other
13 articles 25 photos 107 comments
Wow... This is really meaningful with such a short article.

on Oct. 22 2011 at 7:03 am
SmileyBabe SILVER, Union, Connecticut
5 articles 0 photos 16 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Whatever"

Oh my god I loved it!

on Oct. 20 2011 at 3:51 pm
iamonecoolradiator, London, Other
0 articles 0 photos 22 comments
I like how you leave it kind of ambiguous.  I really thought it was a great piece of writing but maybe you could extend it a bit? then maybe it would have even more of an effect! You don't have to, but if you ever have a spare moment could you take a look at my work? thanks x

on Oct. 20 2011 at 10:55 am
deleteddeletedFoff, Columbus, Ohio
0 articles 0 photos 53 comments
......if i were your teacher i'd be sending you to the counselor...but bravo....

on Oct. 12 2011 at 1:39 pm
ERochelle23 BRONZE, Glendale, Arizona
2 articles 0 photos 4 comments
I really like this! Your word choice and imagery is fantastic, and you never actually specify how you are a monster which makes me want to read more. Although it sounds good at first, you use "Little did she know..." several times, I think if you changed the wording around a bit it might sound even better!

on Oct. 11 2011 at 11:57 pm
Anonymous_7 SILVER, Branson, Missouri
6 articles 0 photos 118 comments

Favorite Quote:
-The only time you can get away with murder is when writing a book!

I just read this over again and I still love it! Keep up the great work!

on Oct. 11 2011 at 5:17 pm
HarlequinHurricane, SomewhereLikeThat., Other
0 articles 0 photos 19 comments

Favorite Quote:
A horse ate my cousin once. Me and horses got a fuuuueeeddd.

i love this. is the monster like a vampire or just a regular murderer? its really sweet - i know thats strange, but...