Breakup Advice

September 24, 2009
By , Putnam, IL
After those amazing relationships end, you have to ask yourself how things will continue. If you broke up with your partner, you must either be unhappy with them, mad at them, tired of them, or some other circumstance. So, if it is you who breaks up with the other, stop and think. As one single person, you don't have any idea what the other might go through. One moment to you is completely different that that of another. For example, you might go on a date and have the time of your life, oblivious to that fact that the one you care for is about to slit their wrists in boredom.
Just and example.
But that is something that you can relate to a breakup. You might think that things are better off without the other. They might be tripping and falling behind you, trying to catch up and get you back. It happens a lot, and these breakups are the worst. I myself went through one. And I've scraped my knees so much over these past to years tripping and falling after her(yes, two years. She's so beautiful I can't stop thinking about her). I've found out the the first and most important thing you can do to stay out of those horrible, bad break ups, is to forget. Easier said then done, right? Well, there is only one way to completely get over such a thing. Overwrite the memories that the two of you shared. Now, people call this a rebound, but isn't every boyfriend/girlfriend after the first a rebound? You must make better memories with this person. Have a greater time, and think about the new things you share rather then all the things you used to share with the other. Take it from me, with time, almost everything is mendable.

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BrittDawn This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jul. 16, 2011 at 6:37 pm
my boyfriend was in love with his ex for 2 years, after she dumped him. i'm not so sure about him. he says he loves me and i do believe him. but i just dont know how to tell if I love HIM. i've started asking random people. but i havent gotten any good answers. IF YOU WANT TO LET ME KNOW YOUR OPINION ON HOW TO TELL IF YOU LOVE YOUR GF/BF LET ME KNOW PLZZZZ!!!
rEMEMBERtHErIOT replied...
Aug. 9, 2011 at 1:31 pm

i love to tell you but i have no idea...  my two best friends dated each other for about 6 months then they broke up. they fighted a lot and i was always caught in the middle of it. i didn't really knoq what to tell them cuz both would get upset if i said something good about the other for a while. they got over it but i wish i could have told them somehing along these lines. kinda unrealated........


BrittDawn This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Aug. 18, 2011 at 7:48 pm
doesnt matter. :p maybe people love eachoth when theyre totally dramatic
PrincessSparkle replied...
Sept. 5, 2011 at 10:50 am
If you've gotta ask yourself if you love them then its an obvious no. Nobody ever thinks about it. Its something that human nature does for us. We just know.
BrittDawn This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Sept. 6, 2011 at 6:10 pm
i know i love him now though. thanks
tinejohnson replied...
Sept. 15, 2011 at 10:20 am
When you can wake up in the morning, happy for no reason other than that you can see him, when you can get dressed, thinking, he is going to love me in this. When you hold his hand and never want to let go, when you can go to him when no one else can help you, and just his presence can make it better. Thats what I thinbk being in love is. I could be wrong, but its what I am looking for. :)
BrittDawn This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Sept. 16, 2011 at 3:34 pm
yeah your totally right :)
Eggie94 said...
Jul. 15, 2011 at 1:02 am
He was a year younger than me. Too immature and not ready to love like I was. I broke up with him a little more than a month ago. He was my first boyfriend and I would have done anything for him. It hurt soooo bad every single day and I still think about him but it's getting better. I've finally excepted that it's over now and slowly I'm learning to move on.
thatclarinetgirl said...
Jul. 14, 2011 at 7:13 pm

my story, however, is a bit long. I was trying to go after this guy that was not really worth it after all. now he wants me back and I am severly doubtful that he has changed. I know how it feels to go through a bad break upo and only Recently have been able to go on with someone new. i havent met that someone new yet but, you know, im hoping. Should I post my whole sad story here to read?


singingdetective replied...
Aug. 25, 2011 at 9:46 am
I know EXACTLY what you're talking about. My ex and i were on and off for about 8 or 9 months.  We "broke up" about a total of 6 times. He was too domineering, clingy, and selfish, but time after time, I gave him more chances. I forgave him because I honest to God DID love him and if you love someone, you don't want them to go through that kind of pain and you don't want to give up those dreams you had with them. But I realized a while ago that he's not worth anothe... (more »)
singingdetective replied...
Aug. 25, 2011 at 9:51 am
and just some food for thought, every time I forgave him, I wondered if he had changed, too. In the end, he hadn't. There are two ways to see if this person has changed-- 1. You get back with them. Wait a while. If they go back to their habits, they're NOT WORTH IT.  or 2. You don't get back with them. Stay friends/stay in contact. Still wait a while. If their demeanor seems to have changed, go with option 1. It is ALWAYS best to give someone chances. Keep giving them chances until you're s... (more »)
thatclarintetgirl replied...
Aug. 28, 2011 at 12:01 pm
Thanks, singingdetective. I'm glad im not alone. I can see he has changed abit, but, you know how that is, and im not sure if i can take another heart break. We are good friends now, and i guess we will see how it goes. Utill then, it would be nice to get to know someone new. thanks fo the help.  Let's be friends
thatclarinetgirl said...
Jul. 14, 2011 at 7:08 pm
this is simply amazing. Thanks!
october34 said...
Jul. 13, 2011 at 3:31 pm
SO I had a crush on the nicest, sweetest, best guy ever. One problem, he was a year older than me. All of my grade knew that I liked him so they made me talk to him. It was really awkward. After a couple of days of my friends pushing me towards him he got tired of me so he just said, to my face, "You know I don't like you so just STOP!" I was so depressed I started cutting my wrists. He graduated in May and now I'm just... lost. :(
pageturner This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Sept. 6, 2011 at 11:46 pm
You shouldn't do that to yourself. Attraction can work in strange ways. You could be upset over this guy, and not even notice the guy of your dreams walk by. Don't worry there's someone for everyone.
october34 replied...
Sept. 7, 2011 at 11:24 pm
It is so kind of you to say that... especially to soemone you don't know. :)
Keli123 said...
Jul. 12, 2011 at 1:54 pm
Sweet Article. :) I broke up with my boyfriend back in November after I was with him for almost a year and a half. Of course this long relationship was absolutely horrific through most of it. He fell under the category of abusive. Both mentally and physically. He was also extremely controlling and he wouldn’t let a day go by where I didn’t see and talk to him. For half of a school year my daily schedule was to go to school, hangout with him all day, go home. Take a shower, talk on th... (more »)
singingdetective replied...
Aug. 25, 2011 at 9:57 am
WHOA. I had an ex just like that too! If i didn't text him back RIGHT AWAY, he would always get upset. If I had any spare time, it should be spent with him-- no theatre, choir, speech team-- NOTHIN'. Even if I loved doing it, he hated it just because it took time away from him. But when I was with him, it was sunshine, rainbows, and daises. Take me away from him even for a second? Don't even go there....... And when I did break up with him, he would always manipulate me and make me feel terrible... (more »)
Keli123 replied...
Aug. 25, 2011 at 12:31 pm
WOW! That's insane how alike they are!! i can relate to that sooo much! especially the manipulation after we broke up. For instance a couple days after we broke up we were on the phone becuase we were going to stay friends and he was just like "I can change so your not getting off the phone until you take me back." which was ridiculous cause i was just thinking "wow you saying that proves your not going to change." lol. but were not friends now and I haven't talk to him since last november! whic... (more »)
singingdetective replied...
Aug. 26, 2011 at 12:34 pm

you wanna read some of my work? i'll read yours!!! :D

random, but i also found out he's a liar. After we broke up the most recent time, we were still in contact, and told him about how i just came home from choir rehearsals. HE asked about the show-- when and where it was. HE SAID HE WOULD COME. I get a txt in the middle of the show with a ":)". At the end of the show, he said "it was nice to see you again. you looked beautiful as always". I ask him what song he liked best. He couldn't... (more »)

singingdetective replied...
Aug. 26, 2011 at 12:35 pm
:P sorry i have no idea why that posted twice
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