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Dysfunctional
October 12, 2009
We were so wrong,
That we made it right.
We slept through the day,
And only talked at night.
We never told the truth,
We only lied.
We always laughed,
When we should have cried.
We were never bland,
We had to add spice.
We were always naughty,
But rarely nice.
We used the words hate,
Instead of using love.
We fell into a ditch,
Instead of rising above.
© Lucie C., Chatham, NY
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This article has 116 comments.
xxCMMx16 said...
on Apr. 14 2010 at 9:01 am
nice poem i liked how you used something you went threw to create the emotion that you did.
ryne8 said...
on Apr. 14 2010 at 8:53 am
i like this poem. good jod
.rauha said...
on Mar. 23 2010 at 7:39 am
As bluemagnet said: "Thnx for ur feedback:) but honestly i'm kinda tired of everyone talking about how the poems r in the "wrong" categories....doesn't the content n flow of the poem matter more?"
I agree about the flow of the poem, but a sonnet has a specific form. You cannot call your poem a sonnet if it is not. I like your poem, it's beautiful, but it really isn't a sonnet. I've written them before, and they are a tough form to master.
I agree about the flow of the poem, but a sonnet has a specific form. You cannot call your poem a sonnet if it is not. I like your poem, it's beautiful, but it really isn't a sonnet. I've written them before, and they are a tough form to master.
MangoMoonlight BRONZE said...
on Feb. 23 2010 at 4:43 pm
You're right! They never specify what type of sonnet.
bluemagnet22 PLATINUM said...
on Feb. 23 2010 at 1:14 pm
Thnx for ur feedback:) but honestly i'm kinda tired of everyone talking about how the poems r in the "wrong" categories....doesn't the content n flow of the poem matter more?
MangoMoonlight BRONZE said...
on Feb. 7 2010 at 7:19 pm
I don't think this is a sonnet. They have to have 10 syllables per line.
bluemagnet22 PLATINUM said...
on Dec. 11 2009 at 7:05 pm
Thanx:))
lol ur a great writer too n i"m sure u could capture it as well probably better lol but thanx for ur comment:))
lol ur a great writer too n i"m sure u could capture it as well probably better lol but thanx for ur comment:))
its amazing, i would think that everyone would have a relationship like this at some point in their lives, and you managed to capture each moment perfectly. even tho i have felt the same, you did a better job then i could have ever done trying to write on this. great writing, keep it up
kpf1991 said...
on Nov. 11 2009 at 10:13 pm
Hey could you check out "anguish" or "They see through me" and rate it or just let know what you think? you have great talent and i'd really appreciate your input
bluemagnet22 PLATINUM said...
on Nov. 7 2009 at 10:35 am
Thanx:) i appreciate ur opinion;)
bluemagnet22 PLATINUM said...
on Nov. 7 2009 at 10:28 am
Oh thanks:)
bluemagnet22 PLATINUM said...
on Nov. 7 2009 at 10:28 am
Thank you:) awe I'm sry u just got dumped:(
bluemagnet22 PLATINUM said...
on Nov. 7 2009 at 10:27 am
Oh thanx:)
Jackie Smithson said...
on Nov. 5 2009 at 12:53 pm
Love it sure has its ups and downs lol and you captured that well
bluemagnet22 PLATINUM said...
on Nov. 5 2009 at 12:38 pm
idk i really don't think about it too much i just write lol sry i wish i could help!
~Corrii~ said...
on Nov. 5 2009 at 12:02 pm
Naughty n Nice lol love it!!! The words you used are amazing and then on top of it all you made it flow and ryme! You are AMAZING!!!! lol i'm jealous =P
Alexx627 said...
on Oct. 28 2009 at 2:41 pm
Vry Good=) Well written n quite cute
