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Dysfunctional

October 12, 2009
By bluemagnet22 PLATINUM, Dearborn Hts, Michigan
More by this author
bluemagnet22 PLATINUM, Dearborn Hts, Michigan
24 articles 16 photos 644 comments

Favorite Quote:
You were born an origanal why die a copy?The secret to success is the consistency to pursue.To the world you may be one person,but to one person you may be the world.To receive the right answer,you must ask the right question.Don't worry be happy! :)

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We were so wrong,
That we made it right.
We slept through the day,
And only talked at night.
We never told the truth,
We only lied.
We always laughed,
When we should have cried.
We were never bland,
We had to add spice.
We were always naughty,
But rarely nice.
We used the words hate,
Instead of using love.
We fell into a ditch,
Instead of rising above.

© Lucie C., Chatham, NY

The author's comments:
This poem was inspired by a previous relationship... can you see why it didn't work out?!?
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This article has 116 comments.

Calliashi SILVER said...
on Sep. 24 2011 at 11:08 am
Calliashi SILVER, Litchfield Park, Arizona
6 articles 0 photos 74 comments

Favorite Quote:
The man with the key is king and honey, you should see me in a crown. ~James Moriarty

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Good poem. The relationship didn't seem to work out, lol. But really this is a great piece. I'll be looking out for your other pieces as well ;)
Narene_baby SILVER said...
on Sep. 2 2011 at 6:29 pm
Narene_baby SILVER, Scappoose, Oregon
7 articles 0 photos 4 comments
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I really enjoyed this peice. You put the realtionship in words everyone understood but still had a good flow. If you would like you should check out some of my poems. I am somewhat new at this site and would love your feed back. :)

 

IAmWhoIWantToBe PLATINUM said...
on Aug. 6 2011 at 9:06 pm
IAmWhoIWantToBe PLATINUM, Manila, Other
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Favorite Quote:
‎"I’m learning how to drown out the constant noise that is such an inseparable part of my life. I don’t have to prove anything to anyone. I only have to follow my heart and concentrate on what I want to say to the world: I run my world." - Beyoncé

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The reasons why relationships don't work! Good job on this poem! 
LaBellaVie SILVER said...
on Jul. 20 2011 at 3:19 pm
LaBellaVie SILVER, Bethel, Connecticut
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Favorite Quote:
with every single letter and every single word, there will be a hidden message about a boy who loves a girl

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Very interesting... it described the actions of many people in modern society. Beautiful job (:
zone7294 GOLD said...
on Jul. 14 2011 at 8:25 pm
zone7294 GOLD, Newport News, Virginia
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I love this poem it's different. You should check out my poetry here's the link to one of my poems TeenInk.com/poetry/sonnet/article/349142/poetry-speaks/
SierrahS GOLD said...
on Jul. 6 2011 at 8:35 pm
SierrahS GOLD, Bronx, New York
14 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
Be a leader, not a follower

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Beautiful, it was nicely written :)
EnochDreams GOLD said...
on Jun. 21 2011 at 11:43 am
EnochDreams GOLD, Simi Valley, California
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Favorite Quote:
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‎"I think the biggest thing that my failures have taught me is that you can't succeed without failing"

-Rick Riordan

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How did it get its name?
shayKittyFlcoka GOLD said...
on Jun. 18 2011 at 12:35 pm
shayKittyFlcoka GOLD, Blockingham, Illinois
11 articles 0 photos 20 comments

Favorite Quote:
I don't give my emtions to people who dont matter to me. you cant make me angry, happy, sad, or watever unless you count.

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i still liked this poem although the relatonship between u n whoever didnt work out. lolz it actually reminded of a realtionship of mine too. gud work!
TheBug BRONZE said...
on Jun. 6 2011 at 10:51 pm
TheBug BRONZE, Uniontown, Kentucky
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Favorite Quote:
“I see myself as a huge fiery comet, a shooting star. Everyone stops, points up and gasps "Oh look at that!" Then- whoosh, and I'm gone...and they'll never see anything like it ever again... and they won't be able to forget me- ever."- Jim Morrison

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This is really, amazing. I'm sorry to hear about what happenned with your relationship, though. It seems that you came out of it stronger, and for that, props to you.
RanaHewezi1998 SILVER said...
on Jun. 6 2011 at 10:39 pm
RanaHewezi1998 SILVER, Ames, Iowa
5 articles 0 photos 63 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I've ended up where I needed to be."
-Douglas Adams

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i'm sorry the relationship didn't work out :( nicely written
R5andParamore BRONZE said...
on Jun. 6 2011 at 3:38 pm
R5andParamore BRONZE, Manalapan, New Jersey
2 articles 0 photos 67 comments
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Nicely written, refreshing. Great job.

 

lovemeso14 BRONZE said...
on Jun. 6 2011 at 2:03 pm
lovemeso14 BRONZE, Gurnee, Illinois
1 article 13 photos 3 comments
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I definitely can relate to tis. Amazing work, great job :')
kat27 GOLD said...
on Apr. 27 2011 at 4:44 pm
kat27 GOLD, Jacksonville, Florida
14 articles 1 photo 30 comments
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very short. thumbs up.
Bren_Bren BRONZE said...
on Mar. 10 2011 at 6:23 pm
Bren_Bren BRONZE, Memphis, Tennessee
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Favorite Quote:
If you stand for nothing you will fall for anything

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This poem is great!! Love it
lion101 said...
on Mar. 10 2011 at 9:34 am
i like ur poem
HeatherBee BRONZE said...
on Jan. 3 2011 at 11:04 am
HeatherBee BRONZE, I Live In, Texas
1 article 0 photos 1979 comments

Favorite Quote:
Go on and try to tear me down. I will be rising from the ground, like a skyscraper

Love is louder than the pressure to be perfect

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ooh, kool rhyming, awesome poem :D it was worded nicely.. Great job, i liked it!!
avantgarde GOLD said...
on Aug. 11 2010 at 7:34 pm
avantgarde GOLD, Stillwater, Minnesota
10 articles 0 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
I write for the same reason I breathe...because if I didn't I would die. --Isaac Asimov

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I love the realness of this poem! Very lovely, but it's not a sonnet. Sonnets have ten syllables per line, and their rhyme scheme goes like this:

 ABABCDCDEFEFGG

But nice work anyways :)

bluemagnet22 PLATINUM said...
on Jun. 21 2010 at 11:27 am
bluemagnet22 PLATINUM, Dearborn Hts, Michigan
24 articles 16 photos 644 comments

Favorite Quote:
You were born an origanal why die a copy?The secret to success is the consistency to pursue.To the world you may be one person,but to one person you may be the world.To receive the right answer,you must ask the right question.Don't worry be happy! :)

View profile
Thank you!!
bluemagnet22 PLATINUM said...
on Jun. 21 2010 at 11:25 am
bluemagnet22 PLATINUM, Dearborn Hts, Michigan
24 articles 16 photos 644 comments

Favorite Quote:
You were born an origanal why die a copy?The secret to success is the consistency to pursue.To the world you may be one person,but to one person you may be the world.To receive the right answer,you must ask the right question.Don't worry be happy! :)

View profile
Thank you:) ya it's just a lil bit obvious right?!? lol
ShenelleCrystal SILVER said...
on Jun. 19 2010 at 8:53 am
ShenelleCrystal SILVER, M, New York
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Laugh your heart out dance in the rain cherish the memories ignore the pain love + learn forget and forgive because remember you only have [one life to live] ♥

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this is really good :) keep it up

please come check out some of my work =]