I’ve got everything I could ever want
yet I'm not happy
I have it good
and act like I have it the worst
I have a great life
so why don't I act like it
I should be in top of the world
but I'm at rock bottom
maybe I never really wanted what I had dreamed of all my life
I am living my childhood fantasy
I need a change
it’s time for a new reality
the problem is finding a dream
something that is truly attainable
I don’t need another fantasy that comes crashing down under the harsh views of reality
I want something real
something to hold on to
I don’t want something that  will just slip through my hands like sand
but I've committed myself to this fantasy I don’t even want anymore
how do I let go of all those years of work to attain the unattainable
all that work to not mean a thing
how do I let go
I never had a plan b
I will be lost
how do I find myself again once I cut the thing that has defined me from my life
how do I figure out what to do next
so I have to stay
leaving would be too deadly