Meaning has lost all meaning
do i want
to feel      or not feel
do i need
to hurt      or not hurt
am i being
understood     or misunderstood

i can’t grasp
if i am touching you
or you are touching me
is it all the same?

have i lost my humanity?
my ability to care?
is it because they did not care for me?

they faked it
so i copied them
but i’m not faking it
it’s just who i am

i don’t know     what i feel
or even if i feel
i don’t know     how bad it hurts
or even if it hurts
i don’t know     if I’m misunderstood
or even if i understand

who i am