I.
when you hear a word often enough,
it becomes a part of your vocabulary,
meaning,
a string of certain pitches and sounds that you somehow perceive to have
meaning
was repeated so many times that you became able to perfectly replicate this pattern of sound
meaning,
that since the dawn of our time,
what people have said to us has defined
how we think and who we think we are
meaning,

if someone had not said to you over and over and over again:
you are worthless worthless worthless worthless worthless
what would you think you are?
would you still feel
like an elephant is sitting on your chest every time
you can’t think of the right words?
would you still start to
sw-sw-sw-sweat every time you start to stutter, in fear that
they will call you loser loser loser loser loser if you don’t st-stop

why do certain pitches and sounds
have the power to make our throats close up?
why why why do these words reverberate in our heads until we can’t hear ourselves think and
where where can i find meaning bigger than dictionary definitions?

if you were not a waste waste waste waste waste of space
would you still be speechless?