The tea burns my lips
on this odd eve.
Yesterday is the day I
forget the address of the home
I used to live in
Or is it tomorrow?
I fear the future
and my past is Pandora's box.
I lost the key but
your voice can pick locks.

Oh mother, you sicken me
you lied to the judge under oath
is that a sin or is it
just a lie
cause if there was
a god
why allow
what you've done to my life?

The midnight oil burns my skin
as I wonder
why I was so undeserving that I never had
a father to play catch with
I live on the internet,
2 year old videos on how to shave
left scars on my chin
because my father never
had the heart
to show me how.

16 and this isn't my family,
I'm a lost dog taken in
by strangers cause I
kept sleeping on the porch
begging for food
so they locked me in
16 and I just want a mothers
love,
a family, and
a way to erase the memories.
It left scars, deeper than
my razor as I sat alone in my room
and that's a fact.
The smell of alcohol before court,
the sweat on my neck as
you sold your pain pills
but mother,
you should of taken all of them
because my world is sick
and you are its disease.

If I was never born,
at least I'd be free
because I'd never wish
this pain on anyone.
My ribcage heart
drums the duct tape mind I
hold together in bleeding palms.
I am a shadow in the evening
watch me stretch to the horizon
as I blend into the
concrete,
watch me fade like
I wish all of these
thoughts
would.

Oh mother,
why?