Dear Freddy,

Where are you now??
In heaven or hell??
Do you enjoy it there??
Is it better than here??
I forgot to tell you when you were alive...
That my love for you would never die...
And still my love for you it grows...
Though I try to mask it...
I've fallen in love again...
But he does not like me...
You were the only one.
Perfect. Perfection.
For me.
I hope Jesus loves you.
Or Satan treats you well.
Or maybe you've been spared
from that fiery hell.
Confusion takes me over.
Pushing me to the ground.
Tears drag me under...
I'm drowning...
But no one is here to save me.
This letter tried to flow, but died instead.
And with these tears I write you...
In hopes you could live instead.
Maybe you're still here.
Lying in my arms.
You're hair surrounds your silly face.
The grinning ball of fun...
Maybe it is true...
What my mother says...
Maybe my hallucinations...
Finally took me over.