Drowning | Teen Ink

Drowning

March 23, 2023
By Anonymous

I wish I could've helped

I walked to the water even though I was scared

I saw you drowning

But I watched from the beach

 

The sand is so warm between my toes

The water is so cold as it enters your lungs

I feel your breathing

But I cannot jump in.

 

It took me so long to swim ashore

This land, this sun, this quiet mind

But even then I can't be happy

If you aren't here with me

 

My bones are frozen in peril

My eyes are screwed tightly shut

I ignore your screams and pleas for help

And escape to my home above

 

Your heart

It stops

As you sink even deeper

 

And what became of my guilt

Is now drowning in the water.


The author's comments:

I ended up choosing first the word of 'Guilt' or 'Regret'. Both of them in my mind are very similar when it comes to discussing what I discuss in the poem. In the poem, I describe leaving someone behind to make myself happier, and the speaker continues to doubt themselves and come up with rationalizations as to why they are doing so, but still feel guilty beyond belief. In the poem itself, the action of leaving them behind is compared to watching someone drown, very much similar to the situation of drowning wherein many people watch as bystanders believing that they could not save the person who is in pain. In the end, the fault is that the person standing on the shore should have tried to help, but is morally in the wrong for wanting to stay where they are. They acknowledge the pain of the other person, but cannot throw themselves downwards once again. I use this ongoing metaphor as well as staggering pacing, especially during scenes where imagery of something unpleasant is happening (ie. heartbeat stops, cold water lungs). There is also gradual repetition of "I" or "My" in certain stanzas to end with the feeling of the speaker, and to take the attention away from the person drowning, possibly alluding to the fact that the speaker may be too stuck within their own head.


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