Tonight is the night

I keep appearances 

I join the family for dinner and

accept the plate my mother has 

prepared for me

Fragrant rice and meat fill my nose

and my primitive mouth 

salivates 

for it does not know better

But I do

Deep down, 

this plate disgusts me

I twiddle my silverware 

I disperse the rice with my fork

I pretend to chew

But they are not fooled

      Quit playing with your food

They need proof

They cannot know I’ve been sleeping through my meals

Everyone is staring and waiting 

I am the carnival’s main attraction

      Let’s see if the anorexic will eat tonight

I'm feeling lucky

And I do, ladies and gentlemen.

The fork is in my mouth,

but the food is in my napkin

My bones tingle from hunger

My stomach acid burns 

And I haven't seen this plate in a week

I had a big lunch,

that’s all