Sometimes I lay awake and imagine

One day my dreams being more than an illusion 

Sometimes I wonder if my brain will release

That I will not be a prisoner to me 

Somedays a force fogs my head

An unwanted guest steppes right ahead

Some Days I have the same knot in my stomach

Like a shoelace knot just getting tighter

The more I pull its strings the more I am it's puppet

No control like Henson's muppets

Do you ever feel like your realistic messages 

Are a trains fuel that your not driving

Your positive affirmations held as hostages 

Have you ever felt like your breathing a different atmosphere

Thinning as every inhaling disappears 

Are you sometimes looking blind at the world

And everyones telling you how beautiful it is out here

Are you ever wondering tirelessly

When you'll next have relief

Do you sometimes wish you could close your eyes

And switch on a perspective that thrives 

Do you sometimes wish you could see the stars 

Have time in your head to fictionalize mars 

Do you ever feel afraid to shed your tears

Vulnerability just feeds the fear

No matter how hard you try to kill

The ghost inside you whispering lies to your ear

Do you try to block the sirens call

To defeat its beauty as it drags your soul

Do you sometimes think you see the end 

Joy for a second maybe you have a friend

Have you ever felt like you could one day never wake up

And the whole world would discover your makeup

Do you ever hide the devil inside

Try to put it for sale on the curb side 

Do you every wish for some peace 

After awhile the cost means nothing to me

Have you ever felt naked without this weight

Maybe if it escapes your blend in with the landscape

Maybe this devil makes me look special

Not just a number 2 pencil with a pink eraser

Have you ever felt your life is one continuous conclusion

It never gets better, your live has already ended

Do you see God as a cheap artist

Who got a bit lazy a scribbled your picture

A painting he later tried to hid in the closet

Do you ever look in the mirror

Your whole body shadowed with fear

Have you ever felt like if depression would kill you here

Die with your mask on, no marshmello reveal

Do you ever feel like your orange in a tree with apples

Unique and original but labeled to fragile

A torch in a field of matches 

A hammer in a factory of glasses

A broken calculator while doing taxes

A paragraph in a poems stanzas 

A white feather in a gush of ashes

A blue sky mist a sea of shooting flashes

A curve at every corner 

A stop sign barricades you from going further.

In every action you can only see its opposite reaction

Blind to newtons equal reaction 

All you see are the mistakes of your passion

You never add all you do is subtraction 

You always have unnatural immune reaction 

To every action you do right or wrong

Always present dissatisfaction. 

Have you ever?

Feather in ashes. 

Have you ever?

Gone against the grain

Broke the knife 

And guess whos the blame

This is not no scrabble game

My words don't rhyme or spell out phrase

My tears never smother my hearts flames 

My pain never weighs out the devils gains 

Have you ever?

Felt like Feather in Ashes 

Have you ever

Your jeans desperate for patches

Your eyes hungry for glasses

To see the world out of 2d view

To subdue the mind blocked to dream

Have you ever?

Have you ever?

Like Feather in Ashes

Like purple grasses

Like streaming molasses 

Like open latches

Like Feather in Ashes.