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Stolen

March 30, 2012
By Behind_a_Plastic_Smile GOLD, Roseville, California
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Behind_a_Plastic_Smile GOLD, Roseville, California
17 articles 1 photo 129 comments

Favorite Quote:
"if you're not 1st you're last"

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“Ahhh!”
I must scream
But only in my dreams does sound come out
For my was fight stolen long ago
By the man with no face
But I know his hands
They were cold
As they slid to the land of innocence
And stole it’s secrecy
In front of mine eye

“Haha!”
I must laugh
But only in my dreams does sound come out
For my joy was stolen long ago
By the man with no name
But I know his tongue
It burned
Like acid
Disintegrating my hopes for society
As it made it’s way from my person to my personality

“Wahhh!”
I must cry
But only in my dreams does sound come out
For my tears was stolen long ago
By the man with no soul
But I know his snake
It hurt
As it slithered
With forceful passion
Until it but down
And as the blood,
Defeated in its attempt to stay intact
Rolled over in anguish
The snake’s venom made its way to finish the deed

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This article has 10 comments.

StarlitSunrise DIAMOND said...
on Apr. 7 2013 at 12:04 pm
StarlitSunrise DIAMOND, Clemmons, North Carolina
56 articles 0 photos 253 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Blessed are they who see beautiful things in humble places where other people see nothing." ~Camille Pissarro

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The repetition here is very effective. I also liked how you used various descriptions to symbolize both what the man was doing as well as how it effected the girl. Very powerful writing!
butterfly123 said...
on May. 19 2012 at 1:21 am
butterfly123, Banglore, Other
0 articles 0 photos 408 comments
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wow! very powerful. i could  feel the pain. you make repetetions work very well. you're a very talented person and don't ever let that talent go to waste. keep writing !! :D
TheWeirdPoet SILVER said...
on May. 14 2012 at 9:51 pm
TheWeirdPoet SILVER, LExington, Kentucky
5 articles 0 photos 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
I think people forget that humans are animals too.

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This poem is very creative. The repetetion of "only in my dreams" brought interest along with the several quotes you've served that relate to the memory that you explain. Very appealing to the senses. 5 star poem right here.
JessicaQ PLATINUM said...
on Apr. 23 2012 at 12:13 am
JessicaQ PLATINUM, North Vancouver, British Columbia, Other
23 articles 5 photos 28 comments
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very powerful poem :D keep writing! its amazing!
HoldingFast GOLD said...
on Apr. 11 2012 at 4:03 pm
HoldingFast GOLD, Plano, Texas
11 articles 0 photos 21 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If I wasn't meant to fly, I wouldn't have these wings"

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Pain. It's the emotion that delivers the best poetry. If embodied correctly it can make the reader feel it. This does that. I weep for whatever message is hidden inside this. Beautiful.
HoldingFast GOLD said...
on Apr. 11 2012 at 4:03 pm
HoldingFast GOLD, Plano, Texas
11 articles 0 photos 21 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If I wasn't meant to fly, I wouldn't have these wings"

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Pain. It's the emotion that delivers the best poetry. If embodied correctly it can make the reader feel it. This does that. I weep for whatever message is hidden inside this. Beautiful.
Behind_a_Plastic_Smile GOLD said...
on Apr. 2 2012 at 11:07 pm
Behind_a_Plastic_Smile GOLD, Roseville, California
17 articles 1 photo 129 comments

Favorite Quote:
"if you're not 1st you're last"

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It’s suppose to be the thoughts, perhaps nightmare, of someone who’s virginity was stolen by a rapist (which I am not). The pain of not knowing whom that person is. The pain of having something so sacred stolen from you. 
Behind_a_Plastic_Smile GOLD said...
on Apr. 2 2012 at 11:01 pm
Behind_a_Plastic_Smile GOLD, Roseville, California
17 articles 1 photo 129 comments

Favorite Quote:
"if you're not 1st you're last"

View profile
Its suppose to be from the prospective of a virgin rape victim (which  i am not). It is kind of complicated how this came to be, but this is my take on kind of the thought process that one might go through. How you have no idea who they are, but they stole something sacred from you.
AgentOrange789 GOLD said...
on Apr. 2 2012 at 10:51 pm
AgentOrange789 GOLD, Friendswood, Texas
16 articles 0 photos 59 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;It&#039;s a saying they have, that a man has a false heart in his mouth for the world to see, another in his breast to show to his special friends and his family, and the real one, the true one, the secret one, which is never known to anyone except to himself alone, hidden only God knows where.&quot;<br /> -James Clavell, &quot;Shogun&quot;

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This is really powerful. I hope I'm not mistaken on what this poem means, though...I'd like to think it's about a nightmare, but if it's about something that really happened to you, then I'm truly deeply sorry for you. 
beautifulspirit PLATINUM said...
on Apr. 2 2012 at 6:18 pm
beautifulspirit PLATINUM, Alpharetta, Georgia
35 articles 0 photos 1398 comments

Favorite Quote:
The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.<br /> --Eleanor Roosevelt

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I like how you described the thief in your nightmare--- "the man with no face, soul, name..." The stanzas are broken up perfectly.