She’s so sad. It's obvious she tries to hide it, which will annoy you. Her fake smile is so perfected, and so fake. She knows how to lie about being okay. And she'll tell you she's “just tired” over and over again. If you don't let her have her lie, if you keep pushing her to tell you what's really wrong, she'll blame it all on you. She'll blow up, yelling. And after that, she gives one hell of a silent treatment.
Speaking of silence, she won't communicate. She seems to think that everyone already know what's going on in her head. So beware, making plans will be a struggle. She won't tell you when or where. She'll just assume you know, then get mad if you don't. And after that, like I said before, she gives one hell of a silent treatment.
Oh, and conversations? Just a waste of your time. She's so bad at talking and she doesn't seem to know how to interact with people. She won't make eye contact, that's for sure. And there will be a lot of mumbling. So you might as well not talk to her. Chances are she won't respond anyway. Or you'll get a whole lot of one word answers. So if you love to talk, you'll hate her.
However, she may be quiet but she isn't blind, or deaf. She knows how to listen to the things you aren't saying. She notices more than anyone I know. And if you're having a bad day, she'll already know even if you don't say anything. If you love to talk, you'll love her. She'll happily listen to you rant. She's a great listener. And she may not be great at talking, but her words on paper are beautiful. Plus, she won't ever talk just to talk, which means you won't have to deal with any constant rambling. But when she does talk, please listen, because she only talks about the things that really matter to her, and those are beautiful things. She isn't good at it, so be patient with her struggle, with her tears. While she may not be great at communicating, her actions tell you so much. The people who are close to her mean the world to her and she’ll love you more than herself.
Then there’s her sadness. Even she doesn’t understand it completely, so don’t think you ever will. But in order to understand it better, you’ll have to listen to her when she talks. You’ll have to read her writing. You can’t just tell her how much you care; you’ll have to show her. And if you do that, she might start to open up to you about her past, about her life. About the beautiful, terrifying things that live in her mind. Then, once you here her, you may think: “All this and all she has is PTSD?”