Chaos Theory MAG

November 14, 2008
By Debbie G., Arlington Heights, IL, Arlington Heights, IL

Carolyn says she believes in angels
while mascara spiders creep thickly along the
heavy baggage beneath her eyes like the
black pitch of the school hallways at night or
the charcoal that she dips her fingernails in and I
remember cheating on my math test that morning
So
I tell her I believe in people.

Roasted honey nut, the color she was born with but
you really wouldn’t know it because of the midnight L’Oréal
she chooses, tragically highlighted with Punk Pink or
Raging Red from a bottle and 15
minutes of waiting –
It spills limply over her black eyes whenever she leans down to write and
Carolyn says she believes in fate.

In planets aligning in the universe and
Feng shui that keeps mice away and prevents ulcers but also
makes a girl fall in love with a boy but
I know all about chemistry and hormones and catalysts so I
think I believe in science.

In reincarnation, she thinks she’ll come back as a bird
Or maybe a peacock and I say I agree when I
see those striped stockings that come to her knees and
neon earrings lifeless at her shoulders but she only laughs …
tells me I never really see her and to
call her later.

Now with the dial tone in my ear
the cold trembling and I’m suffocating on nothing
because I really see her and I
know she believes in the afterlife but
she doesn’t believe in laughter and
the phone just rings and rings and rings …

Carolyn said she believed in angels.



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This article has 375 comments.


sophiem said...
on Dec. 10 2010 at 12:41 pm
great poem, beautifully written

on Dec. 10 2010 at 9:02 am
kmarie14 PLATINUM, Hyrum, Utah
22 articles 5 photos 246 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Life is either an adventure...or nothing" -Helen Keller

wow. absolutley. amazing. beautiful. thanks for sharing

on Dec. 10 2010 at 8:52 am
llamachick PLATINUM, Seneca, South Carolina
42 articles 3 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best."
— Marilyn Monroe

i really really enjoyed reading this.it was amazing.

Savanne BRONZE said...
on Nov. 25 2010 at 2:37 pm
Savanne BRONZE, Colfax, California
4 articles 0 photos 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I was never going to amount to much anyway, but now, statistically speaking, there's a better chance that some part of me will go on to greatness somewhere in the world. I'd rather be partly great than entirely useless." ♥ -Unwind

This peom is beautiful, keep writing you have talent.

on Nov. 19 2010 at 12:07 pm
PalabrasHermosas, Winnsboro, South Carolina
0 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
\"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.\"
---Walt Emerson

I love this poem. You are very descriptive about your friend and the poem is descriptive in itself. I hope you contiue writng because you have an incredible gift.

on Nov. 18 2010 at 8:36 pm
silentvocal SILVER, Chicago, Illinois
5 articles 0 photos 44 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don't try to fix what isn't broken

exactly! it is not too predictable and keeps you fallowing it-you just keep reading and then when it's suddenly over at a drop ending-you read it again, and again, and again understanding it more and more and i love this-it really does make you lightly, gently choked up, like in a good suddle way-it is pure beuty

on Nov. 18 2010 at 4:14 pm
Ahrenzell BRONZE, Foxborough, Massachusetts
3 articles 0 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Possibility is no longer a factor. All that matters now is truth." - The Plague of Ahrenzell

My only comment is that maybe you could focus more on meter and rythm in you poetry. Other than that, it really is quite well written.

bigdreamer14 said...
on Nov. 18 2010 at 12:21 pm
bigdreamer14, Y Ya Need To Know???, Louisiana
0 articles 0 photos 27 comments

Favorite Quote:
You can say that I'm a talented writer, but all I can do is write down my feelings on paper and form them into sentences with my own personal flavor.

I really do not understand what you mean when you say the title does not make sense nor the way the poem is constructed. That's what makes it more real.

bigdreamer14 said...
on Nov. 18 2010 at 12:19 pm
bigdreamer14, Y Ya Need To Know???, Louisiana
0 articles 0 photos 27 comments

Favorite Quote:
You can say that I'm a talented writer, but all I can do is write down my feelings on paper and form them into sentences with my own personal flavor.

Well constructed and heart-wrenching to some degree because the reader knows what she has done to herself. I think that this should be turned into a book. I am SERIOUSLY moved by this and I believe that you are very talented.

LilBenj SILVER said...
on Nov. 18 2010 at 12:10 am
LilBenj SILVER, Richfield, Utah
6 articles 4 photos 20 comments

Favorite Quote:
There is a certain providence in the fall of a sparrow. - Hamlet

You certainly have a way with weaving words - what a beautiful poem. Thank you for sharing your soul so eloquently.

Keep writing.


on Oct. 27 2010 at 12:13 pm
nefariouslyme, Richland, Michigan
0 articles 0 photos 72 comments
This is so tragic, yet so beautifully written. You know something is good when it makes someone want to cry; and honestly, this made me want to cry. Good job.

on Oct. 27 2010 at 2:02 am
SickImage SILVER, Klamath Falls, Oregon
9 articles 1 photo 74 comments

Favorite Quote:
The room was very quiet. I walked over to the TV set and turned it onto a dead channel-white noise at maximum decibels, a fine sound for sleeping, a powerful continuous hiss to drown out everything strange."

Good choice for title.

It definatly caught my eye 'cause I have a writing called Insanity Theory :)

(It's not on here though)

I like your style.

Good work.

 


on Oct. 20 2010 at 11:17 am
LadyMoon DIAMOND, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
54 articles 0 photos 23 comments

Favorite Quote:
I'm so weird I'm normal
-Khalil, a friend

Omg FUCKing AmAzInG!1 i Freakin LOVED this PoEM!I can't wait to see more of your work. Your so talented, I mean this peom actually made me cry at the end. GREAT job!!! :)


j-rye SILVER said...
on Oct. 5 2010 at 11:52 pm
j-rye SILVER, Toronto, Other
6 articles 0 photos 17 comments

Favorite Quote:
When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace - Jimi Hendrix

i loved the flow of this and i LOVED the foreshadowing.

it also reminded me of someone, amazing poem.


Amnoona BRONZE said...
on Oct. 5 2010 at 4:35 pm
Amnoona BRONZE, Bridgeport, Illinois
1 article 1 photo 10 comments

It took 3 times before I understood this, and when I did I was outstanded.

What an amazing poem. Very well written and such a breathtaking idea. Well done, this is purely fantastic!


on Oct. 1 2010 at 7:23 pm
ZackHarmes BRONZE, Trinidad, Colorado
2 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
I pray that my loneliness might spur you to find something good enough to live for, something great enough to die for. - Joy Begley.

One tell-tale sign of good poetry is honesty. I really enjopyed the placement of key ideas and defining metaphors, beliefs, etc. Good work, I'm highly envious of your talent.

on Sep. 13 2010 at 6:13 pm
DiamondsIntheGrass GOLD, Martinsville, New Jersey
14 articles 1 photo 279 comments

Favorite Quote:
Worry is simply a misuse of the imagination.

WOWWWW!!! what the...? she did whaaaat? (this is my inference... correct me if i'm wrong...) wow.

the ending was really powerful.

but, the way the lines were separated were a little awkward, and the title is a little odd... considering the poem. it doesnt quite capture the essence of it.

sorry, i had to include that little thought.  but this poem is AMAZING and i loved it and hope to see more... and i would love it if you could take a look at some of my poems.  thanks.


on Sep. 13 2010 at 5:25 pm
SaMiLoVe97 SILVER, Okawville, Illinois
9 articles 3 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
If it doesnt break your heart it isnt love, if it doesnt break your heart its not enough. Its when youre breaking down with your insides coming out.Thats when you learn what youre made of.-Switchfoot<3

umm im sorry if i took it the wrong way but was that meant to be criticism.

I think this peice was beautiful and full of life.(:


AsIAm PLATINUM said...
on Sep. 13 2010 at 3:25 pm
AsIAm PLATINUM, Somewhere, North Carolina
48 articles 3 photos 608 comments

Favorite Quote:
"According to some, heroic deaths are admirable things. (Generally those who don't have to do it. Politicians and writers spring to mind.) I've never been convinced by this argument, mainly because, no matter how cool, stylish, composed, unflappable, manly, or defiant you are, at the end of the day you're also dead. Which is a little too permanent for my liking." — Jonathan Stroud (Ptolemy's Gate)

What does one say when one has experienced something so incredible, so real yet other worldly, so simple yet complicated, so utterly amazing, that one's brain is left swimming and one's heart is left throbbing?  If you know, pretend that is what I said after reading this.

on Sep. 13 2010 at 2:15 pm
Inflatable_Corn SILVER, Odessa, Florida
8 articles 0 photos 7 comments
Amazing. The emotional impact is astonishing.


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