Chaos Theory | Teen Ink

Chaos Theory MAG

November 14, 2008
By Debbie G., Arlington Heights, IL, Arlington Heights, IL

Carolyn says she believes in angels
while mascara spiders creep thickly along the
heavy baggage beneath her eyes like the
black pitch of the school hallways at night or
the charcoal that she dips her fingernails in and I
remember cheating on my math test that morning
I tell her I believe in people.

Roasted honey nut, the color she was born with but
you really wouldn’t know it because of the midnight L’Oréal
she chooses, tragically highlighted with Punk Pink or
Raging Red from a bottle and 15
minutes of waiting –
It spills limply over her black eyes whenever she leans down to write and
Carolyn says she believes in fate.

In planets aligning in the universe and
Feng shui that keeps mice away and prevents ulcers but also
makes a girl fall in love with a boy but
I know all about chemistry and hormones and catalysts so I
think I believe in science.

In reincarnation, she thinks she’ll come back as a bird
Or maybe a peacock and I say I agree when I
see those striped stockings that come to her knees and
neon earrings lifeless at her shoulders but she only laughs …
tells me I never really see her and to
call her later.

Now with the dial tone in my ear
the cold trembling and I’m suffocating on nothing
because I really see her and I
know she believes in the afterlife but
she doesn’t believe in laughter and
the phone just rings and rings and rings …

Carolyn said she believed in angels.

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This article has 376 comments.

on Feb. 3 2009 at 11:35 pm
I LOVED IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Words can't describe

wolf333 said...
on Jan. 31 2009 at 7:37 pm
Wow that was amazing! I beleive in angels to but i also beleive that God will protect me through everything. Try talking 2 him.

Peaceseeker said...
on Jan. 27 2009 at 11:44 pm
Wait did she like kill herself or somthing I don't get it!? but I did really like it. it seems very unique so bravo on being ornginal my hats off to you.

Caydence said...
on Jan. 26 2009 at 5:32 am
Amazing in everyway. The most creative and orginal thing I've ever read. Just perfect. This will stay in my memory for a very, very long time.

sblood33xx said...
on Jan. 18 2009 at 4:09 am
this is a great poem. you should be very proud ^^

on Jan. 13 2009 at 3:57 pm
This poem deserves a toast for strong, original point, and creative structure.

It was completley brilliant and branches out beyond the things we think we know to reveal the things hiding behind these masks we wear.

dreamer said...
on Jan. 9 2009 at 11:14 am
The way your writing puts an image in someone's head, and then in the next line makes the level of complexity and meaning beneath the image increase is breathtaking.

chef.elena9 said...
on Jan. 8 2009 at 1:21 am
This is the kind of poetry I wish I could write well.

on Jan. 7 2009 at 10:16 pm
i adored how you worde it, the breaks in lines and stanzas. I was slightly confuzed with the third adn second to last paragraphs, but i beleive that this is the perfect time to become confused and have a shade drawn over. ververy nice.

on Jan. 5 2009 at 3:21 pm
I love the closing, as sad as it is. It was brought together nicely and miss_omni_torey is right.... Powerful.

almost_there said...
on Jan. 4 2009 at 6:04 pm
I really like this- it conveys its message very well. This is really really good! Keep writing!

sarahw said...
on Jan. 3 2009 at 5:13 pm
this is beautiful :)

on Jan. 3 2009 at 4:33 am
I have been writing and reading poetry for years, stupid stuff like "and the sun rises over the moon..." and I was not even going to go on this site tonight, but I got and e mail from Teen ink saying that id been posted online, so I went to veiw it and I saw that I actually did get posted, Then I had a feeling that I should go look at the magazine, so I do and what do I find? This..... Your depth is inspirational, reminds me in my faith, my hope my hope for the slim chance that I make it to heven, and it also tells me you understand things of the mind and soul and makes me see you'll make it there someday for sure just for your moving creativity. Thanks for the poem, im glad you had the inspiration to write it, you should write a series. Great Job!!!!!!!!!

CaliGirl said...
on Dec. 31 2008 at 5:53 am
this was such a talented and eloquent piece of writing you really know every tone you want to bring. i loved it

kmc24 said...
on Dec. 27 2008 at 2:23 am
wow that's great! I love the message and just amazed.

keep it up!(:

on Dec. 25 2008 at 11:13 pm
this is really, really good. it almost made me cry. this is a powerful poem, and i think they were right to put it in the magazine.