Daddy's Womb | Teen Ink

Daddy's Womb MAG

April 23, 2008
By Anonymous

i asked my father if i could swim,
and he said that i would drown.
The Sea would imprison me – he said
if my feet had left the ground.

So i walked out to the water,
and cried out – how ’bout now!
He said, a little bit further, Son,
and then you’ll leave the ground.

i stepped on sand then stone,
from hollow ground to sturdy.
The sky was at my level as I
gazed at the birdie.

The Sea brought me a new idea,
the urge to flee to the high.

i asked my Father if i could fly,
and he said, sure, Son – go try.

i jumped as high as i could.
Still, i landed on the ground.
i saw my Father pull on a chain,
then i knew that i was bound.



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This article has 2181 comments.


Safeleo said...
on May. 25 2010 at 1:25 am
Safeleo, Iwakuni, Other
0 articles 0 photos 118 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Looking up into the night sky is like looking into infinity - the distance is incomprehensible and therefore meaningless."
-Douglas Adams

I love this poem. It's really thought provoking. Please post comments on my work to help me improve since your such a good writer.

BABE. said...
on May. 24 2010 at 12:32 pm
BABE., Saugus, Massachusetts
0 articles 0 photos 3 comments
babe would love this poem sfm

manuslice said...
on May. 24 2010 at 12:29 pm
manuslice, Saugus, Massachusetts
0 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
oio

what that kid chris  is hes right great poem

on May. 24 2010 at 12:24 pm
would you like to slap bellys, Swamscott, Massachusetts
0 articles 0 photos 4 comments
id rather read little red riding hood while i sit on my fingers

on May. 24 2010 at 12:23 pm
would you like to slap bellys, Swamscott, Massachusetts
0 articles 0 photos 4 comments
i did not like this poem it was miserable

manuslice said...
on May. 24 2010 at 12:17 pm
manuslice, Saugus, Massachusetts
0 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
oio

thqats was a great poem like o daddy

on May. 23 2010 at 9:43 am
Joob-Stache GOLD, Rice Lake, Wisconsin
16 articles 0 photos 96 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don't be afraid to take a chance, to take a fall, in the end it could be worth it all<3

LUVVVVVVVV ITTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!

jkcoolz SILVER said...
on May. 22 2010 at 8:31 pm
jkcoolz SILVER, Chesapeake, Virginia
5 articles 0 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
“A guy walks up to me and asks 'What's Punk?'. So I kick over a garbage can and say 'That's punk!'. So he kicks over a garbage can and says 'That's Punk?', and I say 'No that's trendy!” billie joe armstrong

very unique good

on May. 22 2010 at 2:28 pm
this poem is very nice brave and succseful

Silenced said...
on May. 21 2010 at 1:34 pm
very nice, its a poem many people can relate too. :)

on May. 21 2010 at 1:11 am
BloodyMary PLATINUM, N/A, Other
22 articles 8 photos 70 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life is like a box of chocolates; You never know what you are gonna get.

This poem is very deep, very deep.

I love how you wrote this and the metaphorical messages are good. This is so great! Great writer!


on May. 20 2010 at 9:40 pm
This poem fascinates me. I wonder who you are speaking of. God?

on May. 20 2010 at 9:37 pm
You can have rhythm but you're not supposed to rhyme. 

on May. 20 2010 at 8:30 pm
Origami_Giraffe, Goose Creek, South Carolina
0 articles 0 photos 6 comments
This honestly isn't what I would call a "free verse" poem. Isn't the whole point of free verse is that it has no rhyme or rhythm? That said, this definitely would have been better if it was free verse. Some of the words stuck in to keep up the scheme weren't just jarring, but the literary equivalent of being hit in the face by a 2x4. I mean, birdie? Really?

on May. 20 2010 at 7:04 pm
olympian-queen, Charleston, South Carolina
0 articles 0 photos 39 comments

Favorite Quote:
Yesterday is history. Tommorrow is a mystery. And today? Today is a gift that's why they call it the present.

umm............. a little bit confusing but the concept was nice. needs a little editing in the beginning so the reader can understand the situation. needs more of a flow in the beginning to get the reader prepared for the "punch" in the end when they realize that your father was pulling on the chain the whole time.

XxBVBGRLxX said...
on May. 19 2010 at 10:51 pm
XxBVBGRLxX, Edwardsville, Illinois
0 articles 0 photos 5 comments

Favorite Quote:
\"I won\'t believe this lie. I know there\'s something more inside. When darkness is all you see, this is our Sweet Blasphemy.\" -A6

This is a beautiful poem!! Great job!!

on May. 19 2010 at 9:05 pm
teresita BRONZE, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
2 articles 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
love is blind but i can still see in the dark

this is beautiful i love the emotion

Shabria SILVER said...
on May. 19 2010 at 3:42 pm
Shabria SILVER, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
5 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Be yourself" Quote by Miguel Jontel
"Don't be a talker, be a doer" Quote by Ms. Tanequa
"Enjoy Life" Quote by Akil
"Do what you love"

I also love this poem!!! It is so wonderful!!! Your use of words is out of this world!!!

on May. 18 2010 at 10:12 pm
rachel22 BRONZE, Granger, Indiana
3 articles 0 photos 2 comments
wow! this poem can be taken and thought of in so many ways. and because of this trait that many other famous poets have, so many people can relate. great job!

on May. 18 2010 at 9:32 pm
SarahJumps SILVER, Richmond, Virginia
5 articles 0 photos 64 comments

Favorite Quote:
Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.
-Eleanor Roosevelt

I think, at a child's birth, if a mother could ask a fairy godmother to endow it with the most useful gift, that gift should be curiosity. -E.R

amazing poem. i could see it happening so clearly, yet it leaves so much room for us to relate and interpret.