Daddy's Womb | Teen Ink

Daddy's Womb MAG

April 23, 2008
By Anonymous

i asked my father if i could swim,
and he said that i would drown.
The Sea would imprison me – he said
if my feet had left the ground.

So i walked out to the water,
and cried out – how ’bout now!
He said, a little bit further, Son,
and then you’ll leave the ground.

i stepped on sand then stone,
from hollow ground to sturdy.
The sky was at my level as I
gazed at the birdie.

The Sea brought me a new idea,
the urge to flee to the high.

i asked my Father if i could fly,
and he said, sure, Son – go try.

i jumped as high as i could.
Still, i landed on the ground.
i saw my Father pull on a chain,
then i knew that i was bound.



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This article has 2181 comments.


on Jun. 18 2011 at 4:07 pm
apoetssoul SILVER, Lockport, New York
8 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
When you reach the end of your rope, tie a knot in it and hang on. -Thomas Jefferson

Amazing how you used words in such a way as to convey a message that robs me of them :) Truly speechless, this is beautiful and I am personally touched by it. Please continue to write, you are gifted, and you'd better believe it :D God bless!

on Jun. 18 2011 at 2:50 pm
praveen.Trichy PLATINUM, Thirchy, Other
25 articles 0 photos 57 comments

Favorite Quote:
cruel leaders are replaced only to turn other leaders cruel

hey ur poem only i remember was amazing one.........i like it(:good job

on Jun. 17 2011 at 2:33 pm
estherhoran__ GOLD, Bell Gardens, California
10 articles 0 photos 24 comments

Favorite Quote:
Never lose an opportunity of seeing anything beautiful, for beauty is God's handwriting. -Ralph Waldo Emerson

AMAZING!!!

on Jun. 16 2011 at 8:50 pm
inkblot13 PLATINUM, Auburn, New York
41 articles 1 photo 160 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If I knew where poems came from, I'd go there"




- Michael Langley, 'Staying Alive'

I can't tell you how many times I've read this poem and how many times I've fallen in love with it! Great job, keep up the excellent and truly superb work! :D (PS- check out some of my work? I'm dying for feedback!!)

on Jun. 16 2011 at 6:43 pm
littlemonster1 BRONZE, Saltsburg, Pennsylvania
1 article 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
you were born this way.

that is a good poem

on Jun. 16 2011 at 4:29 pm
Sherlock SILVER, Columbia, South Carolina
5 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
Live today as if you'll die tomorrow.
It's never too late to be what you might have been.

This was a really good poem! It was very good, and enjoyable to read.

on Jun. 13 2011 at 6:09 pm
PassionFruit SILVER, Templeton, California
6 articles 0 photos 4 comments
Wow, good job. I really like it. I like the message you're getting across. As far as critique goes the only line that confused me was "the sky was at my level as i/ gazed at the birdie" Im confused as to where "the birdie" came from. I would understand if you had said A birdie, but THE birdie gives it more significance that the reader can't understand. Sorry, I don't mean to sound like a critic here or be harsh, I actually really love this poem. Keep writing!! And check out some of my work, once its published :)

BSANCHEZ said...
on Jun. 13 2011 at 12:49 pm
I can kind of understand what your saying. But I can't fully.

on Jun. 12 2011 at 12:18 pm
rubyrainstorm SILVER, Closter, New Jersey
7 articles 0 photos 275 comments

Favorite Quote:
Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.
-Buddha.

This was a really nice poem, but maybe you could make your message a little bit clearer. Also, if you have time, please check out my poem, The Girl Inside, and others. Thanksssss! :)

inkflowerKNC said...
on Jun. 10 2011 at 2:44 pm
inkflowerKNC, Townsend, Delaware
0 articles 0 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
"When at first you don't succeed, try, try again."

it's pretty good, i like it.

Ang1996 BRONZE said...
on Jun. 9 2011 at 11:27 am
Ang1996 BRONZE, N. Waterboro, Maine
1 article 3 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
Never grow up

I don't get it what dose this mean. other than that it sounds like its a good poem

on Jun. 8 2011 at 12:04 pm
Br11anna BRONZE, Winston Salem, North Carolina
3 articles 8 photos 6 comments
Really nice poem!

on Jun. 6 2011 at 9:22 pm
AndreaLatinLoveLopez BRONZE, Boaz, Alabama
4 articles 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
"No woman sleeps so soundly that the twang of a guitar will not bring her to sit beside her windowsill"
-Spanish Proverb

love it!! filled w/ lotsa emotion

on Jun. 4 2011 at 11:23 am
RanaHewezi1998 SILVER, Ames, Iowa
5 articles 0 photos 63 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I've ended up where I needed to be."
-Douglas Adams

it has good rythmes!

on Jun. 3 2011 at 11:00 am
Highbarfreak87 SILVER, Indian Hills, Colorado
5 articles 2 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
"There is no tomorrow, so do it today"

Its such an odd poem to follow but its good!'

on Jun. 2 2011 at 3:00 pm
SweetPolarBearHugs PLATINUM, New York, New York
27 articles 0 photos 75 comments

Favorite Quote:
"All conflict in literature is, in its simplest form, a struggle between good and evil." - unknown author.
"All that we see or seem
Is but a dream within a dream." - Edgar Allan Poe

this is truely a beautiful poem seriously it is

torivix SILVER said...
on Jun. 1 2011 at 6:59 pm
torivix SILVER, McLean, Virginia
7 articles 8 photos 2 comments
I love this! it's so... mysterious, yet so down to Earth. keep writing, please!!!

on Jun. 1 2011 at 3:27 pm
WeAllBurn PLATINUM, Vermilion, Ohio
24 articles 0 photos 71 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong." ~Mahatma Gandhi

wow.

i am wordless.

<3


on May. 29 2011 at 2:28 pm
RahmaReads BRONZE, New York, New York
1 article 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
Anything is possible, if you put your mind to it ;).

This is beautiful! You really have potential.

Alicia :) said...
on May. 27 2011 at 10:53 am
Wonderful Poem !