Daddy's Womb | Teen Ink

Daddy's Womb MAG

April 23, 2008
By Anonymous

i asked my father if i could swim,
and he said that i would drown.
The Sea would imprison me – he said
if my feet had left the ground.

So i walked out to the water,
and cried out – how ’bout now!
He said, a little bit further, Son,
and then you’ll leave the ground.

i stepped on sand then stone,
from hollow ground to sturdy.
The sky was at my level as I
gazed at the birdie.

The Sea brought me a new idea,
the urge to flee to the high.

i asked my Father if i could fly,
and he said, sure, Son – go try.

i jumped as high as i could.
Still, i landed on the ground.
i saw my Father pull on a chain,
then i knew that i was bound.



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This article has 2181 comments.


on Dec. 10 2014 at 8:07 am
Brian110 SILVER, Jonesport, Maine
8 articles 1 photo 79 comments

Favorite Quote:
if life gives you lemons..... squeeze them back in life's eyes!

You know, This poem has got to be the best poem this website has ever seen. When ever I read poems this poem always is "today's top voted poem" and I can se for my self the reason. 

Ashley Korin said...
on Dec. 9 2014 at 7:23 pm
Ashley Korin, Bloomingburg, New York
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment
I think you're right here. Father and sea were both capitalized,while "I" was not. This was probably to elaborate on how he was viewed as the least important, and smallest entity in the poem. 

KaylieJ said...
on Dec. 9 2014 at 7:05 pm
KaylieJ, Millerton, NY, New York
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
"We are here to laugh at the odds and live our lives so well that death will tremble to take us." -Charles Bukowski

Obviously I can't be sure, since I'm not the writer of this poem, but I feel like he used the lack of capitalization as emphasis on the way his father belittles him. I mean, clearly it was not laziness; he capitalized other words like "Son" multiple times throughout. So there must have been a reason for capitalizing in the way that he did.

on Dec. 9 2014 at 3:22 pm
Jackson1997 GOLD, Hartland, Wisconsin
12 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
"No" -Rosa Parks

This poem is sub-par

on Dec. 5 2014 at 1:30 pm
dylan rittenhouse, Dalton, Georgia
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment
it was good story

Brainiac said...
on Dec. 4 2014 at 9:39 pm
I really enjoyed reading your poem! Your word choice and phrasing were excellent. One reccomendation would be to capitolize the "I's"- I found this editing error to be slightly distracting, and it took away from your otherwise awesome poem! 

on Nov. 24 2014 at 11:19 am
Kookie_monster29 BRONZE, Nashville, Tennessee
1 article 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
Never be to hard on your self! Keep your head up your beautiful!

That was so pretty!

on Nov. 21 2014 at 4:49 pm
RedHadan BRONZE, New York, New York
3 articles 0 photos 53 comments

Favorite Quote:
Yes: I am a dreamer. For a dreamer is one who can only find her way by moonlight, and her punishment is that she sees the dawn before the rest of the world.

This was beatifull

on Nov. 21 2014 at 4:48 pm
RedHadan BRONZE, New York, New York
3 articles 0 photos 53 comments

Favorite Quote:
Yes: I am a dreamer. For a dreamer is one who can only find her way by moonlight, and her punishment is that she sees the dawn before the rest of the world.

Like those backpacks with the leashes for the parents to hold on to?  

on Nov. 18 2014 at 1:00 pm
WindRunner GOLD, Troy, Michigan
11 articles 0 photos 44 comments

Favorite Quote:
For those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will fly on wings like eagles, they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

I feel like it was a betrayal of trust. What a father should want for a child.

on Nov. 18 2014 at 12:58 pm
WindRunner GOLD, Troy, Michigan
11 articles 0 photos 44 comments

Favorite Quote:
For those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will fly on wings like eagles, they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

I got angry as I read the end of the poem. They say freedom is life. No one should be restricted like that!

on Nov. 17 2014 at 11:04 am
Freshatilly BRONZE, Las Vegas, Nevada
4 articles 0 photos 4 comments
DEEP

on Nov. 17 2014 at 10:54 am
Anyuhhhh BRONZE, Las Vegas, Nevada
4 articles 0 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
It's hard to beat someone who never gives up

This poem was pretty deep, and I enjoyed it a lot. I would suggest you add more dialogue or more to the story. I really liked the end and her trust in her father. This poem really spoke to me.

on Nov. 17 2014 at 10:33 am
Briseida25 SILVER, Las Vegas, Nevada
5 articles 0 photos 5 comments
I love this poem. 

on Nov. 16 2014 at 1:22 pm
goetz_17 SILVER, Odessa, Washington
9 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I'm selfish, impatient, and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best." -Marilyn Monroe

This poem really speaks to me.

on Nov. 13 2014 at 4:56 pm
poemoheart866 PLATINUM, Goose Creek, South Carolina
29 articles 1 photo 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if only one remembers to turn on the light."
-Albus Dumbledore, Harry Potter.

This was a lovely poem and I enjoyed it very much so!

Paakhi SILVER said...
on Nov. 7 2014 at 8:58 am
Paakhi SILVER, Dubai, Other
7 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I'll build a castle out of all the bricks you throw at me."

So deep......

on Nov. 5 2014 at 7:48 am
Brian110 SILVER, Jonesport, Maine
8 articles 1 photo 79 comments

Favorite Quote:
if life gives you lemons..... squeeze them back in life's eyes!

That right there is TRUE poetry. its nice to see some good talent.

.king. SILVER said...
on Nov. 1 2014 at 4:11 am
.king. SILVER, Yeux Bien Tres Bien, Other
9 articles 4 photos 569 comments

Favorite Quote:
( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)

O_O AWESOMMEEEEE!!!! I love that ending, it's so realistic reminds me of the days when my parents would put some sort of string on us so that we wouldn't disappear. :P

on Oct. 22 2014 at 10:12 am
dastal127 BRONZE, Andrews, Texas
1 article 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
Unless someone like you cares a whole lot, nothing is going to get better. It's not.
Dr. Seuss, the lorax
SHUT UP MEG---peter griffin

this peom is very deep and good