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Daddy's Womb This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine.

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i asked my father if i could swim,
and he said that i would drown.
The Sea would imprison me – he said
if my feet had left the ground.

So i walked out to the water,
and cried out – how ’bout now!
He said, a little bit further, Son,
and then you’ll leave the ground.

i stepped on sand then stone,
from hollow ground to sturdy.
The sky was at my level as I
gazed at the birdie.

The Sea brought me a new idea,
the urge to flee to the high.

i asked my Father if i could fly,
and he said, sure, Son – go try.

i jumped as high as i could.
Still, i landed on the ground.
i saw my Father pull on a chain,
then i knew that i was bound.

This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. This piece has been published in Teen Ink’s monthly print magazine.




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Bunnie said...
Dec. 26, 2011 at 6:56 pm
That was absolutely beautiful. I wish I could have your talent!
 
Tremendous said...
Dec. 24, 2011 at 10:06 pm
didn't see that coming. eloquently written. bravo!
 
AlexisTashe said...
Dec. 24, 2011 at 3:03 pm
Beautiful.!
 
MeganRozalia said...
Dec. 22, 2011 at 11:56 am
cant we all just get along
 
PrimaDonna said...
Dec. 21, 2011 at 11:42 pm
I'm confused... How is this free verse?  I like the theme and the way that its written but it is rhyming and has a definite structure...
 
Schuyler said...
Dec. 21, 2011 at 12:42 pm
I love the theme of your poem about an overprotected father that won't let his child go or grow up . I can relate to to this poem a lot because my dad is really overprotected as well.
 
justin95 said...
Dec. 21, 2011 at 12:03 pm

i like it.(:

 

 
trainboy said...
Dec. 20, 2011 at 7:34 am
Really good poem!  I like your descriptions.  Keep writing!
 
trainboy replied...
Dec. 23, 2011 at 9:33 pm
Really, your going to respond with that type of comment?!
 
eliana924 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Dec. 18, 2011 at 9:51 pm
Great poem! So provacative... I especially like the title.
 
Art_Trash said...
Dec. 18, 2011 at 8:49 pm
In a nutshell, an overprotective dad
 
CoolPapaJames said...
Dec. 18, 2011 at 11:09 am
Great poem! Check out my page and read my poetry, if you like please comment and/ or rate. I would really appreciate it :)
 
rescuetruck607 said...
Dec. 17, 2011 at 9:06 pm
what a great poem keep up the good work!
 
ALR107 said...
Dec. 16, 2011 at 6:35 pm
That is a great poem! Unique title...
 
missingxD said...
Dec. 16, 2011 at 12:11 pm
its nice but i dont get it. whats it about?
 
Villangel said...
Dec. 16, 2011 at 11:24 am
Every time I read this, I fall in love with it again.! Great poem.! 
 
A_Voice_Made_to_Be_Heard said...
Dec. 15, 2011 at 8:28 pm
This was so touching. I love how you conveyed a serious message with a hopeful sounding and slightly upbeat voice. There's a naturall flow to the words too.
 
aaron13 said...
Dec. 14, 2011 at 10:06 am
thats a very touching poem
 
Leyna1997 said...
Dec. 13, 2011 at 8:03 pm
Well I clicked on your link and tried to see your stuff but couldn't. and im not trying to make a fight I'm just stating facts.
 
otherpoet said...
Dec. 11, 2011 at 6:45 pm
I think this poem is wonderful. I agree with KatieAtkinson's interpretation. Your poem had a very serious meaning, but as i read it i felt the tempo was rather up-beat
 
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