Yes I have a smile on my face and of course I'm dead in side but does that take away from my happiness or does it take away from my pride, I live a life in which they ask if I'm okay and I say im fine yes I lie, but they ignore the scars on my thighs scared to ask why certain I will tell and they will feel desperate and want to cry, but why cry do you have the same pain, do you feel the hell in side, do you fight it or does it rise I mean, I want to say goodbye but then thoughts come to mind telling me I'm selfish and completely blind, I guess I have a good life I have a mother and two brothers but moms always on her grind so that leaves me alone with my thoughts which seem to hate me and degrade me time on top of time, stupid fat ugly waste of space that's what they tell me and my own thoughts wouldn't lie so I chose to believe them and move on with my life, and this is not a cry for help or a pity party for the public just quietly bidding udo but you'll see me again probably in a newspaper or two.