It lingers.

Every time you speak, it lingers
Forcing your thoughts to rack your brain
And your hands to tremble as you drop them at your sides.

Every time you move, it lingers
A twisted kaleidoscope of frustration
Dread
And fear
It makes you want to vomit.

Every time you slip up, it lingers
Daring you to make a mistake again
Shattering your windpipe with its cruel words
And misfortune.

Every time you find a slight glimmer of hope in the dark, it lingers
Demanding you to question your choices
Beating an answer out of you.

Every time you visit your friends
It jumps on your conscience, like a tick on a rat
It sucks the life out of you
Replacing it with
The poison of fear of rejection,
Abandonment,
Overthinking.

Every time you do even the most mundane of things
It devours up your soul
Leaving you a shell to dry in the wind
You’ll curl in a ball
Wondering if someone, anyone cares
Who loves you and who supports you
But the scariest part is
You’ll never get an answer.

It lingers.