there was a black crow sitting in front of me the day you left. right outside my window, it sat, sheltered from the never ending rain coming in from the west. in its dark, ravenous eyes I saw everything. from the first ‘I love you’ to the last and everything in between, it all sat before me in the eyes of the crow.

that bird would come and go in lonely waves of ‘I miss you’s and nights I spent at my window searching for some sort of truth I never seemed to find. he would leave for days, weeks even, but he would always find his way back to me. eventually, The crow became an enemy of mine. he was no longer my confidant, but a vexatious visitor that couldn’t find it in himself to leave me.

until one day, the crow didn’t come back to me. I sat alone in my room, and without the crow’s eyes to look into, I had nothing left to do but look into my own. into the eyes you once loved so dearly. I stared so deep into myself I swore I could have seen another version of myself. I was the same, but different somehow. it was me, a smile reaching my eyes, my head tipped back in laughter, and a certain light radiating from me. quite frankly, I was without you. and with that thought in my mind, I looked at myself and decided that it was my turn to leave you.

so I will heal, and I will make it beautiful.