Before
Hair flowing through the breeze
As I dive to get the soccer ball.
The thick padded gloves taking the brunt of the hard impact.
The crowd roars when I stand up victorious.
Nobody can get past me
I’m a brick wall.

After
Trying to watch the Olympic women’s soccer game.
I ran away from my friends
To hide in my room.
Thick tears stream down my face.
My choking sobs fill up the empty room.

Before
Walking down the halls with horror.
The loud, echoing laughter finds my reddened ears.
This new school is so much bigger than junior high,
But as I the days go by
I keep walking and I find myself mocking those joyous laughs
And I know this is where I belong.

After
Hidden in my cave.
All holed up with no one to bother me.
Trying to read but with no luck.
The once familiar words suddenly elude me.
I don’t know what this says.
How could this have happened?

Before
Screaming on the winding path
In the car with my friends.
The coaster scoops and twists around
Like it’s trying to find the right path
But keeps failing
Until we reach the end
And it has found it’s home once more.

After
The screams are filled with pain
Echoing through my skull.
My throat would be torn apart if I let out these torturous sounds
But I keep smiling
Hiding my pain underneath a sincere mask.
I’m dying! But I continue to say
“Hi how are you today? I feel much better!”

Before
Standing, crouched down
Waiting for the ball to come.
Finally, the soft leather impacts my palms
And I make my move,
Hooking the defenders leg I twist my body around
Take one dribble towards the hoop
And release.

After
Squinting, trying to see clearly
But the grass keeps moving
Sending me into a confused frenzy.
Where is it really?
Am I on a hill?
A field?
Its making me seasick.
Who knew that was possible;
Seasick in the middle of weeds.

Before
My beautiful brain.
I stare up at the stars and ponder how small we are;
Does our existence really matter
When there are billions of other worlds out there?

After
My broken brain.
Now I ponder how I get up in the morning,
How I am still on this world,
Or is it all a ploy.
Am I actually dead and in my own personal hell?
How considerate.

Before
Family game night is filled with dares and tricks and taunts
As we move our pieces across the board.
We trash talk each other,
Laughter spilling from our tongues.

After
They went to the park.
I am staying in my dungeon
Plotting my doom.
Where is my future
If I have no present?
The only thing I have is a past.

Before is dazzling.
After is horrendous.