I’m searching for the words that hide between the lines I never wrote.
The keys make me feel broken as I push them.
Did I push them too hard?
     Did I push you too much?
I was never enough, but I’m more than everything you’ve ever known.
I was never enough, but I’m everything you’ve ever known.
So why can’t you feel content with the taste of my heartbeat on your lips?
It’s the smell of blood and pulsing affections, but affection isn’t what you want right now.
You always loved me better when I pushed you away, but I’m in too many pieces.
My harshness came and went with the rhythm of hitting a keyboard to make myself feel sane.
The silence behind this broken screen breaks my heart.
But even if push comes to shove, the keys won’t make it come on. It won’t come on.
    It won’t make me feel like you weren’t wrong.
I’m searching for the words that hide between the lines I never wrote.
The keys make me feel broken as I push them.
Did I push them too hard?
     Did I push you too much?
I was never enough, but I’m more than enough and I’ve asked you enough to give me enough air to breathe.
The air is so sweet in my lungs as they bleed.
So why can’t you feel content with the taste of my heartbeat on your lips?
It’s the smell of blood and pulsing affections, but my affection fades away day to day.
You always loved me better when I pushed you away, but I’m in too many pieces.
You always loved me better when I hated you, but I don’t hate you. I can’t love you.
Love comes and goes with the rhythm of hitting a keyboard to make myself feel whole.
The silence behind my suddenly still hands breaks my heart.
But even if push comes to shove, the keys won’t make my hands move. They can’t move on.
    They won’t make me feel like you weren’t wrong.
But even if push comes to shove, the keys won’t write for me. They can’t write for me.
    They can’t make me feel something because this isn’t right for me.
   They can’t make me feel something I can’t see.
I’m searching for the words that hide between the lines I never wrote.
The keys make me feel broken as I push them, but I’m not broken.
    I’ve never even been broken no matter how it seems.
Did I push them too hard?
     Did I push you too much?
The only person left to shatter is me.
I was never enough, but I’m more than enough.
      It wasn’t me who was broken.
      It was the reflection staring back at me.
      The screen broke so long ago. I just need to let it go.