Ed?

Why won't you talk to me?

Why is it when you do, it is cold and jugdemental?

Why don't you hug me?

Why don't you you even tell me if you are okay?

I would like to ask you these things. 

But I am scared you will pull even further. 

I miss you. 

And things without you have been so hard. 

Even if you were here it would still be hard.

I know I may smile.

But that isn't real.

I'm not even sure if it ever was.

And it may not seem like it,

But I love you, Ed.

Not as a lover.

As companion. 

As a friend.

You are truly my closest friend.

As sad as that is.

I wish you would talk to me.

I wish you would smile with me.

I don't want to fake being happy anymore.

I don't want to fail as a human being.

I'm lonely, Ed.

I'm so lonely.

I hate it.

I hate this quiet stillness between us.

Make it stop.

Please?

Please, please, help me make it stop.

I miss you.

I miss you.

God, I miss you! 

But you don't know that..

Because I didn't tell you..