BETRAYAL

How would you feel if you were stabbed in the back?

In daylight or the middle of the night

Either way it wouldn’t be a pretty sight

Because what hurt me more was when people talk behind my back

Niceness and purity is what people lack

I got pushed around and pushed away

But why would I care on what they say

Why? Because I do care

None of them treated me fair

I was locked in my own box

My heart being beat by boulders and rocks

My parents oblivious to the fact that I was hurt in the inside

My life was one horrible roller coaster ride

Going to that school for how many years

Always in my eyes the word stamped FEAR

Summer end school starts one more

Ideas and thoughts of what I’m in for

Then I thought I met a girl that took me out of the dark

We became Best friend with a spark

Then she left in my heart a big black mark

I didn’t know how to belong

For so many years I suffered for so long

I thought I finally met my best friend

But she made holes in my heart that I thought nobody could mend

She didn’t care how much she hurt me

But it was my fault, that I was as blind as could be

I kept going back to her, not aware that I was being a fool

I had doubts she was using me but I pushed them away

I didn’t want to be alone

But I didn’t know it was actually better to be alone

Why? Because i got stabbed in the back by a girl who called herself my best friend

But all she wanted was my misery and my pain

I was abused,

Misused

By the person I called my best friend

Sharing all my secrets with her

Forgetting about the poem I heard not long ago

Love your friends love them well, but for your secrets do not tell, for if your friend becomes your foe, your secrets everyone will know

She knew that I wouldn’t leave her

She thought me as her loyal dog

When I think of this my is always fogged

Then she left off now pulling me deeper into the darkness

No matter how much I tried I couldn’t get into the lightness

I couldn’t trust properly any more

I let tears down some more

In my heart

Sorrow, sadness, madness, and dislikness were all mixed

I thought I would never be fixed

Then my father said we were moving

And I knew my prayer had been answered

As I walked into the new place I’ll be going to for 10 months, my heart started to beat faster

As I felt small warmth in my heart

The only thing I wanted was a new start

I was hungry, not hungry for food but for love

Was my heart as black as a crow or as pure as a dove?

I finally wanted to belong somewhere

Negatives thoughts trying to enter my mind but I wouldn’t dare

One entered my mind showing me all my past

I didn’t know what was wrong with me

Why didn’t she like me how I liked her

I helped her through her problems

I gave her a should her to cry on

But no

The words that stabbed the most were were not Best friends

She shattered all my hopes into trillions of pieces and when I tried to glue them back together my hands started bleeding

                                                           The only thing she wanted was fame

She wanted to be popular

She used me as a wipe and hanged me out to dry

Just to make herself look better

When she said will stick till the end like sisters

Work together alongside our problems

Feel the same pain

Just more lies

Lies being thrown out me again and again and again

It was my fault that I gave her my trust

So I did deserve the pain after all

But I was wrong,

I met  people,

people that changed my life forever

I found my true friends

And I knew we would stick till the end

They are the healers of my heart that nobody could mend

Our friendship is a pure one that will never bend

Now I feel included and try to be nice

Me and my best friends have strong true ties

We were bounded together

As hard as ripping strong leather

And for a while now

I can actually really

Smile!