I remember floating in water feeling weightless. Everything was perfect. I had zero stress, nothing to worry about. I was oblivious to the horrid truth of this world. Protected by my parents who believed I was destined for greatness. I was their pride and joy, or so I thought. I did not realize I was only the center of the universe to one of my parents. My dad realized two years after I was born having a daughter was not all it was cracked up to be. That being called daddy wouldn’t bring him a warm feeling inside like he imagined, but in reality brought him a thick feeling of regret that boiled up into his throat as he responded yes sweetie? Looking back at my memories I can see the look of disgust in his eyes, the curl of his upper lip as I asked him to pick me up. I wish I could float back in time and tell myself to let him be. Not to call him daddy or ask for him to hold me. Not to create a bond that now seems only one-sided with him. But, to distance myself from him. Let him be happy. Relieve him of his duties to rock me to bed or to play peek-a-boo with me. Just let him be.