It comes in waves,
The sadness.
At times it seems almost bearable
Like, at least I can pretend I'm fine.
But then the wave hits
It gets hard to breathe,
Difficult to stand,
And I'm drowning in sorrow again.


The wave dies down.
Gasping for air,
I make sure no one was there to see
That I'm not as strong as I claim to be.
I take a deep breath
And try to walk away from the ocean
That is overpowering me,
But my feet won't move.


And then the wave hits.
Stronger than before.
It knocks me down,
Fills my lungs,
In the water, I see you
And memories come seeping in.
They flood my mind
And I'm drowning in sorrow again.


The wave dies down.
I get back up on my feet.
I shouldn't be here.
I shouldn't be in this ocean
Where shadows of you swim.
You were never mine to miss,
We were never even friends.
But my sadness keeps me from leaving.
And it comes in waves.