Who I Am | TeenInk

Who I Am

June 5, 2013
By Hanban12 ELITE, Lake Worth, Florida
Hanban12 ELITE, Lake Worth, Florida
133 articles 7 photos 633 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put foundations under them."
Henry David Thoreau

"I fell in love the way you fall asleep; slowly, and then all at once."
John Green


I am a writer.

I want to smile,
But tears slip instead.
I see myself within
The craters of the moon,
A reflection of light,
And a trick to the eye.

I am the tiger feared by most,
Marked with black;
Not pure like the dear
Grazing silently on the plains,
Enjoying the life of spring;
Graceful and delicate,
Warm and elegant.

They're nothing like me,
Oh, nothing like me.

Don’t compare me to daisies,
For I am sharp with thorns of a rose.
Don’t say I’m like radiant sunshine,
For I cower in the shadows of night.
Don’t match my paws
To those of a beautiful,
Rosy cheeked girl,
But please
See my potential.
Shine your love into each
Of my golden eyes.
Glimpse at me, and allow
A grin to spread across
Your hopeful lips.

Watch me pounce,
Though I do not relate to the agile deer.
Watch me capture the Earth
Within outstretched claws,
As raindrops glide from their edge.
I carry a heart
That can be shattered
With just one shutter of a storm;
A flimsy piece of creation.

Hear my growls
Echo throughout the land
As the wind tries to silence
My thunder,
Yet my voice grows stronger
As time stumbles by.

Watch as each stripe is replaced
With glimmering stars,
Each gleaming through a violet sky;
The sky a synonym for life itself,
A canvas for the twilight.

Watch as these words
Become my smile,
And then
Watch me write.


The author's comments:
This poem contains several metaphors which I compare myself to. I was assigned to write an "I am" poem in Language Arts, and this is the result. Hope you like it! :)

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This article has 10 comments.


on Mar. 13 2014 at 8:08 pm
KarmaBites GOLD, Columbia Heights, Minnesota
11 articles 0 photos 135 comments
Wow! I commend you, for this piece took me on a journey! (I love circle plot line, btw.) My favorite lines were "I see myself within the craters of the moon," and "The sky a synonym for life itself, a canvas for the twilight." As I read these lines over, I am awestruck by their profoundness. I LOVE YOUR WRITING!!! With love, Ellie

JuneS GOLD said...
on Sep. 26 2013 at 6:11 pm
JuneS GOLD, Ottawa, Other
18 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
Who knew that being bored could become so tedious?

This is a very wonderful piece. I absolutely love it. You are amazing at writing. I will watch you write. Lol
Keep up the good work. :)

Hanban12 ELITE said...
on Aug. 6 2013 at 9:12 pm
Hanban12 ELITE, Lake Worth, Florida
133 articles 7 photos 633 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put foundations under them."
Henry David Thoreau

"I fell in love the way you fall asleep; slowly, and then all at once."
John Green

Thank you for taking the time for reading this and for being honest. However, this was a very personal poem and I thought the emotion was obvious? But I understand what you're saying and will try my best to make it better :)

OldYoungOne said...
on Aug. 6 2013 at 2:31 pm
The poem is indeed very descriptive and there is obvious skillin the work of your poetry. The only thin I have an issue with is that I am not grabbed by poem. I can understand but I myslef cannot FEEL the poem as I would any other. Facially I enjoyed the poem but I wanted something deeper.

on Jul. 29 2013 at 3:27 pm
Superhero_Fan SILVER, Tomorrowland, California
7 articles 1 photo 163 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Impossible; for How many people did you know who refracted your own light to you?” - Fahrenheit 451

This was amazing! I loved your metaphors with the tiger. This was a very well written piece; I loved it! It was strong and descriptive, and it flowed smoothly. The only thing I found wrong was the 'dear' 'deer' part! Thank you for writing this!

on Jul. 8 2013 at 7:19 pm
Laugh-it-Out PLATINUM, Brooklyn, New York, New York
38 articles 0 photos 445 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light" --Dylan Thomas

Oh my god. This is amazing. This is sooooo good!!! your work is relatable and awesome. Wow, i would have given you an editors choice cuz this is so good. I am sure your language arts class loved this! Because i love it! Congrats on creating such a storng developed piece. Truly brilliant ;) Keep rockin hanban

Hanban12 ELITE said...
on Jun. 21 2013 at 11:05 pm
Hanban12 ELITE, Lake Worth, Florida
133 articles 7 photos 633 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put foundations under them."
Henry David Thoreau

"I fell in love the way you fall asleep; slowly, and then all at once."
John Green

Thanks! haha yeah I caught that after I submitted it... lol blonde moment :)

on Jun. 21 2013 at 10:56 pm
Jade.I.Am ELITE, Fishers, Indiana
214 articles 14 photos 1163 comments

Favorite Quote:
“If you're losing your soul and you know it, then you've still got a soul left to lose”
― Charles Bukowski

This is really good. And obviously a great reflection of yourself :) 5/5 ... My only criticism is that "dear" should be "deer" in the beginning XD

Hanban12 ELITE said...
on Jun. 20 2013 at 1:59 pm
Hanban12 ELITE, Lake Worth, Florida
133 articles 7 photos 633 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put foundations under them."
Henry David Thoreau

"I fell in love the way you fall asleep; slowly, and then all at once."
John Green

Thank u sooo much!

Loleta SILVER said...
on Jun. 20 2013 at 1:33 pm
Loleta SILVER, Scholfield, Wisconsin
5 articles 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
Though it may seem dark now, but I will help you find your light...

I think your poem is very powerful and I feel like i can connect to you through your writting. Also you details are wonderful.