Ponderings on My Carpet | Teen Ink

Ponderings on My Carpet MAG

By Anonymous

I settle back with a dull thump
Onto the carpet that should’ve been swept last week.
Oh well.
I had better things to do.
When I am gone this is how I will be remembered, I think:
The little bits of everything strewn across the floor.
Only a bit of dirt or a ragged thread left for someone else to stumble over,
But to some sentimental soul, it could mean that time we went to the creek
And laughed all night, the only souvenir the mud on our shoes.
Or the day I noticed my favorite jeans were frayed at the cuffs
And left them that way, only to have that ragged thread fall,
Marking something, some small moment of my life
Pressed into the carpet for all to see.
So there it is,
My little carpet collage –
Bits of this and that,
Bits of memories,
Bits of my life –
Taking refuge in the protective crevices of my carpet.
How could I destroy this with one sweep of a vacuum?
…You’re not buying it?
All right, I’ll sweep the floor.

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This article has 47 comments.

OldYoungOne said...
on Nov. 6 2012 at 10:20 pm
I like the poem as well.... it seems you know what youre talkn about could you read my work and give me somepointers?

on Nov. 6 2012 at 6:55 pm
incognito411 BRONZE, Kirkwood, Missouri
4 articles 0 photos 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Things change. And friends leave. Life doesn't stop for anybody.”
― Stephen Chbosky

i completely agree! it pulled me in by the title and i was glad it was a poem, it was well-written but if u spend a little more time on the cadence and slow the shown thought-process, it will be a lot deeper and the words will make the meaning and the reminiscing much stronger.

on Nov. 6 2012 at 7:28 am
ItsJustV SILVER, Saint Ansgar, Iowa
5 articles 0 photos 9 comments
The beginning was a bit slow, but as the piece progressed, I was enveloped in the simple way you mused. Interesting and different. Well done.

on Sep. 23 2012 at 2:39 pm
theshadowofanobody GOLD, Belle Mead, New Jersey
19 articles 0 photos 6 comments
Beautiful. Breathtakingly beautiful.  

on Sep. 1 2012 at 8:21 am
KnitsandPurls GOLD, Mahtomedi, Minnesota
13 articles 0 photos 83 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I cannot live without books"
--Thomas Jefferson

I know. I never knew I would get so wrapped up in a person's choice to sweep the floor!

on Jun. 27 2012 at 12:53 am
i_am_so_very_large_and_towering SILVER, Mililani, Hawaii
5 articles 1 photo 114 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Yet what is any ocean but a multitude of drops?"

i really love this! in the beginning, i was totally prepared for this deep, heart to heart poem, and i smiled when i got to the end:)

on Jun. 5 2012 at 9:28 pm
CharlieSmoke GOLD, Lowell, Massachusetts
18 articles 0 photos 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Nature is a haunted house--but Art--is a house that tries to be haunted.”
- Emily Dickinson

I really like this, it shows a lot of pensiveness and thought. If you spent just a little more time picking the right words and working on the rhythm, it would be even better.

on May. 31 2012 at 5:12 pm
sweetangel4life GOLD, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
19 articles 0 photos 85 comments

Favorite Quote:
"What's in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet". Romeo and Juliet ( Quote Act II, Sc. II).

"Let them eat cake."
Marie Antoinette

well written i really like it ill look at more of ur work... its me from "my poem you read" (a.k.a.) looking at the real world. p.s. u should read my book, approximately 20 or so pages on microsoft, falling in love... i love ur work keep writing!

Goldy97 GOLD said...
on May. 14 2012 at 9:02 am
Goldy97 GOLD, Savona, New York
14 articles 0 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
There is nothing worth hoping for when there is no hope left.

I really like this one as well and it also has alot of meaning to it and behind it.

Indilove GOLD said...
on May. 14 2012 at 8:22 am
Indilove GOLD, Kenockee, Michigan
17 articles 0 photos 71 comments

Favorite Quote:
No one is your strength or guidance. If life is what you wish to live then do not bind your soul to something unreal. The creater nor the keeper can heal you for it is blind faith that leads you.

This is great!!! I love how you ended it, giving in and deciding to sweep the floor it makes the readers go NO! DON'T SWEEP THE FLOOR!!!! hahahaha anyway I love how much I and others can relate to this!! This will be my new excuse to not vacuum hahahaha ;)

on Apr. 22 2012 at 11:52 am
Mimi15 PLATINUM, Belfast, Maine
49 articles 0 photos 73 comments
Check out my poem "puddle-wonderful" :)

Kiyoko GOLD said...
on Apr. 7 2012 at 10:41 am
Kiyoko GOLD, Knoxville, Tennessee
10 articles 0 photos 43 comments

Favorite Quote:
Independence is my happiness, I view things as they are without regard to place or person. My country is the world, and my religion is to do good. - Thomas Paine

This is very nice, and the humorous twist at the end was a very nice touch. My only suggestion is to perhaps get more examples of the things that you could be leaving behind, and give them very vividly. well done!

on Mar. 9 2012 at 10:31 pm
Tornado Misha BRONZE, Ng, Other
1 article 0 photos 53 comments
I wasn't too impressed at the beginning, but when I really got it, I smiled. It was nice. :)

Eminellie13 said...
on Feb. 16 2012 at 3:53 pm
Eminellie13, Ft. Collins, Colorado
0 articles 0 photos 21 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Your success is best measured by the talents you've been given."

Hilarious ending! i love it :) could someone check out some of my work, please?

laurenhoff96 said...
on Jan. 3 2012 at 7:37 pm
laurenhoff96, Ann Arbor, Michigan
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment
I loved the ending :) It was actually so funny! Keep writing because you're amazing at it!

on Dec. 29 2011 at 7:03 pm
beautifulspirit PLATINUM, Alpharetta, Georgia
35 articles 0 photos 1398 comments

Favorite Quote:
The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.
--Eleanor Roosevelt

I like it---it's like if all we are can be summed up with what's on our floor. The poem is funny too at the end---are you really too lazy to sweep the floor? Lol

Ella1 GOLD said...
on Nov. 20 2011 at 8:48 am
Ella1 GOLD,
14 articles 7 photos 137 comments
Nice perspective, I like your take on it!

on Nov. 10 2011 at 7:40 pm
Alexandrathepoet PLATINUM, Leesville, South Carolina
35 articles 0 photos 119 comments

Favorite Quote:
If nothing else, believe in art.

This reminds me of a poem I read in a childrens book of poetry in second grade, i think it was shel silverstein, about how his room held all his artifacts, and it was his museum.


on Oct. 29 2011 at 3:25 pm
ThePeaceDaisy BRONZE, Albany, New York
4 articles 5 photos 223 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Laundry is the only thing that should be separated by color.” - Unknown
I will change this every week!

Lol funny! :D I'm gonna try that!

Lexie96 GOLD said...
on Oct. 23 2011 at 3:21 pm
Lexie96 GOLD, Havana, Illinois
11 articles 0 photos 378 comments

Favorite Quote:
Now Cinderella don't you go to sleep, it's such a bitter form of refuge, oh don't you know the kingdom's under siege, and everbody needs you. - The Killers

Loved it! :) sounds like my carpet. Think that you could check out some of my work? Anybody? Please?