I don’t cry of happiness but of pain
That deep feeling you get that makes your insides churn
That fist in your throat that is too hard to swallow,

I don’t cry of happiness but of pain
You said you love me and you would always be there
You were supposed to be the one to tuck me in at night
I needed you to save me,
Save me from all the pain and hurt the world has put me through
Cradle me and tell me everything was fine and to not be afraid
I don’t cry of happiness but of pain

Those moments when no one believed,
They you told you that you were worth nothing,
I stayed with you, prayed for you,
But you only left me in the rain,
You left me broken shattered,
letting someone else pick up the pieces,
I cry not of happiness but of pain

Ive been broken and stepped on
Left and alone
But nothing ever hurt as bad as the day you left me alone
And all that time I had though it was me
As I child I came up with so many explanations why I wasn’t worth your time
Because of that I didn’t want to be loved because
Who wants a child a mother didn’t want to love?
I had to realize that it wasn’t me it was you
My heart was ready to be mended,
But a piece was missing
A huge whole in the middle,
where a mothers love needed to be
That night I cried but not of Happiness but of pain.