Hardly get sleep.

Give bad advice.

Don't take care of your teeth and gums.

Be afraid of everything.

Be mean to everyone. Before they have the chance to be nice to you

Don't exercise.

Expect everything.

Don't make eye contact.

Reject the opinions of others. Only you are right.

Speak fast, so no one will understand you.

Stay angry and hold grudges.

Be disloyal.

Wear uncomfortable shoes.

Live alone.

Don't ask for help. You don't need help.

Depreciate people who do things for you, even if you wanted them to do it.

When you borrow something, return it in an even worse condition.

Visit foreign countries whose residents have expressed a desire to kill you.

Never express joy.

Be late.

Be self-critical and self-congratulatory.

Always use the elevator.
Keep your house dirty and disorganized.

Don’t be appreciative of anything.

Become obsessed with technology. Never do anything manually.

Don’t stretch.

Be depressed about aging.

Multitask…all the time.

Freak out during a catastrophe.

Answer messages late. Take your time; they’re not going anywhere.

Inhale as much smoke as possible.

Be sassy to a police officer.

Attempt to cross the street when the traffic lights say don’t walk.

Be bad.

Do the same things everyday. Spontaneity is overrated.

Don’t visit people. Stay in your house. People have germs and sometimes their house smells funny.

Be especially malevolent to foreigners and/or new people.

Hate life.

When there’s shooting in the street, go as close to the window as possible.

Walk around screaming at people “You’re all going to die!”

Be gullible.

Have at least 4 cats, so you can become a crazy cat lady.

Don’t trust anyone. Become a loner instead.

When you see a fight starting, stand as near to the people fighting as you can.

Be impolite