Sitting here contemplating
The black ribbon on my hand
How far I’ve come
How the ‘relapses’ became less and less
I still lose myself
These thoughts
Racing
Colliding
Jumbling
The way the overactive imagination can force some over the edge
The way it creates
Steals
Scars
Burdens
A white veil that was stolen
A promise made lost through dark branches
Hands upon hips and fists upon chests
Let it bleed
And wash away
The way I remember you looking at me
Sick
Sick
My ankle twisted upon leaving you behind
I had to race back though
I couldn’t stop myself
Nails to the sky
Eyes to the ground
Earth became horrid and evil
Give me the crystal blues back!
The way they were like the sky pouring over
Studying
Searching
Loving
I wanted nothing now
Not even them
What is the point when the tip is dull?
When the self-righteous are not answered they go
Become deaf and blind
“I am the most humble, but I deserve the bluest of bloods”
They’ll say
And then continue living without worrying
But when pictures from their mind form on their screen of life they must complain again
They blame the higher powers and do not consider their own actions
Your world and my world are as separate as the distances between stars
And the way I once searched for you
I hunted you
But every time
Every single time that I saw you in my crosshairs
I trembled and cried and begged for you to forgive me