Try

A Contemplation for the minds desire.

I felt as though a part of me was dying. Every time I did this. I feel as though before I was completely dead I could do this a thousand times more. I try to prove I am not a soulless mortal. I try not to let the arrogance in all of humanity show through me. I try not to show my own faults, while not trying to be perfect at the same time.

But that is all you can do. Try. And try.

Try not to cry when your heart is broken, time and time again.

Try not to cry when that special things memory enters your mind once more.

Yet I always do.

You can do nothing but try.

Try to be perfect.

Try to show that your arrogance is without fault.

But no one can possibly succeed with that.

You can do nothing but try.

Try to feel joy when in reality you’re pissed.

Try to hide those emotions, bottle them up, till they’re all that’s on your mind.

And then you explode, like an emotional time bomb. You enable the abilities of those around you to help. Yet they cannot. You will always feel as though you are broken once it happens once.

And yet we can try.

We can try to show you that everyone is broken.

We can show that all of us feel that way after the first time we explode.

But nobody knows when they become explosive. When they desecrate the memories of their past. Or when they honor it. When a person becomes explosive it starts with minor change in the way they act, talk, or even their daily motions. Barely noticeable changes.

And when we feel these changes we normally release as much of these fuming, conniving, ambidextrous, backstabbing emotions as is possible.

We try at least to find a reason to explode.

But that’s all we can do. Try.