River | Teen Ink

River

July 8, 2012
By LitLover101 BRONZE, Arvada, Colorado
LitLover101 BRONZE, Arvada, Colorado
3 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
Mares Eat Oats, And Does Eat Oats And Little Lambs Eat Ivy<3


River
Have you ever had the wish,
Almost like the fish,
That you are not captured
To only be devoured
By what seems to be the jaws
Chomping down on our flaws,
Waiting,
Only to be found contemplating,
In this world.


The author's comments:
This poem was inspired by society in the sense that we are all picked apart by society

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This article has 7 comments.


on Aug. 24 2014 at 9:22 pm
GonzaloTovilla BRONZE, Richardson, Texas
1 article 0 photos 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
"In writing, you must kill all your darlings?"
-William Faulkner

Pretty good poem. I like the flow. The flow is gold.

on Nov. 26 2012 at 9:36 pm
TARDISdriver PLATINUM, Colorado Springs, Colorado
28 articles 2 photos 33 comments
I like writing that makes you think. Yours certainly did that.

spudbud GOLD said...
on Jul. 26 2012 at 7:07 pm
spudbud GOLD, Newton, Kansas
19 articles 4 photos 41 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Where is the wise man? Where is the scholar? Have they not been made such a fool in their squalor?

For they desired a sign and sought for the wise

When the precursor of life was right in front of their eyes" - Wolves at the Gate

 I LOVE THIS. You've really painted a picture in my head, and given me something to think about.

 If I may, I would like to add my thoughts onto what you wrote.

It's interesting that you use fish to represent people. We are all swimming in the same ocean, and we are all fish. Sure, we all have our differences, and not every fish is "perfect."

 And then comes along society, rudely scooping us out of the ocean, singling us out, and trying to make is fit in to their mold when we are really ment to swim. However, even the fish that try to fit the impossible standards are devoured because they cannot live up to the expectation of others.

 I think society needs to throw the fish back in the sea and let them be.


on Jul. 26 2012 at 4:07 pm
AliceVanityHarragarra, Gallup, New Mexico
0 articles 0 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Don't bother sleeping without one eye open wide.There's creatures in the night to haunt you..."
-Kellin Quinn

it was fine.i liked it.jst a lil more work.kk?:)

on Jul. 26 2012 at 12:36 am
TraceBatWingsAndBrokenStrings DIAMOND, Oshkosh, Wisconsin
52 articles 0 photos 72 comments

Favorite Quote:
"This gun has stopped time in its tracks, has altered the course of our fate. Destiny is shattered and timeless. Closed eyes feel the cold winds embrace."
-Avenged Sevenfold

I do like this, the only problem is that it is too short! A lengthier version, perhaps?

on Jul. 25 2012 at 3:28 pm
caitiekate GOLD, Hopkinton, New Hampshire
16 articles 0 photos 38 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Do what you want, not what you can." --Me

bella, i love that poem!!! it's short and sweet, but really well written!!! i hope you continue to post more of your work (: my poems are a bit longer, but i would love to have you check them out!!

on Jul. 22 2012 at 2:59 pm
albinotiger GOLD, Gloucester, Massachusetts
13 articles 0 photos 186 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Monsters are real, and ghosts are real too. They live inside us, and sometimes, they win"- Stephen King
“In life, unlike chess, the game continues after checkmate”- Isaac Asimov

Whoa that poem is so powerful! Great work 5 stars! (maybe check out my work sometime)