Thee Dareth | Teen Ink

Thee Dareth

December 28, 2011
By PhoenixCrossing GOLD, Tinley Park, Illinois
PhoenixCrossing GOLD, Tinley Park, Illinois
14 articles 0 photos 179 comments

You dare to throw your "caring" voice at me.
Dare to whisper, dare to proclaim, to speak!
Bludger and abuse with that sledgehammer-
Only nonsense mocks your sick'ning clamor

The snake coiled underneath your slaving tongue
slithers poison through your words, rhythm sung.

You dare to laser opinions, stark eyes.
Dare to glare, dare to peek, to wish demise!
Performing like the hawk you think you are;
Instead, a rat with wings prepares for war.

Mirrors stalk it- hunt it down!- the blunt truth
Prey on innocence, if you had a clue!

You dare to shove thorns into my pale skin
Dare to touch, dare to clasp, to pin!
Obey your tentacles, grasp my wrist
Slime nudges me to the edge of steep cliffs.

The pressure drowning, soaking, choking me;
your sea crushing, stopping, muffling each dream.

I dare slice that snake into tiny parts.
Cage up that wingful rat with think, slick bars
I hunt you down like you preyed on truth!
Yes, from the jungle I dare scream at you!

Because the pure of Mother Nature
has revolutionized her departure.


The author's comments:
this piece is about cheating and a relationship gone wrong.

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This article has 2 comments.


on Jan. 12 2012 at 3:53 pm
PaigeStreet PLATINUM, Juneau, Alaska
47 articles 0 photos 218 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Stay golden"
- Johnny (The Outsiders, S. E. Hinton)

The last lines were my favorite. The subject reminds me of many songs by the band Emery... very concrete, loud. I think you could benefit to swap the words "stark" and "laser." Also, to reconsider the meter in lines like "slime nudges..." because most of the poem sounds like you're yelling, but i find it hard to yell a line like that.

on Jan. 11 2012 at 8:56 am
cebomar9 BRONZE, Brownsburg, Indiana
4 articles 0 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" -Philippians 4:13

wow i love this..it's got great imagery as well...please check out my poem "Unborn Innocence"..any advice would be sweet


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