That Which Cannot Be Mended | Teen Ink

That Which Cannot Be Mended

February 19, 2011
By BrightBurningCampeador PLATINUM, Portland, Oregon
BrightBurningCampeador PLATINUM, Portland, Oregon
42 articles 11 photos 333 comments

I stood before the council
And they passed judgment
Never, they shouted,
Never again
Shall this creature
Touch upon our streets
Nor foul our air
Nor mold our bread
Let it be kept in the dungeon
Until, in the purity
Of the laden moon
We cast it
Into the Lands of Filth

A gaping hole
Was ripped in my heart
I tried to fill it
With rage
How could they dare
To banish me
To name me a “creature”
An “it”
When I was foremost
Among them
Their kin
Their savior

None in the Lands of Filth
Were safe
From my wrath
But I took no joy
In the slaughter of savages
Only one thing
Could satisfy the beast in my soul
Many years
It took me
Many long years
Of bitter scheming
Before opportunity
Came to call

And now?
With the corpses
Of my hated foes
Cold beneath my feet?
The hole
Is still there
And the beast
Lurks within

The hour is come
That my dream
Is fulfilled
And the hour is past
That my life
May return

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This article has 25 comments.

leafy said...
on Sep. 14 2011 at 7:02 pm
leafy, City, Other
0 articles 0 photos 682 comments

Favorite Quote:
Gil: I would like you to read my novel and get your opinion. 
Ernest Hemingway: I hate it. 
Gil: You haven't even read it yet. 
Ernest Hemingway: If it's bad, I'll hate it. If it's good, then I'll be envious and hate it even more. You don't want the opinion of another writer. 

Wow, this is truly amazing, I loved the perspective y chose! 5/5 (what did you expect?XD)

on Sep. 4 2011 at 6:21 pm
Kev-Girl SILVER, Plymouth, Indiana
5 articles 0 photos 86 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life is a maybe. Death is for sure. Sin is the cause. Christ is the cure. :)

Love is the breath of God, and prayer is the melody that makes it sing.

If you cant annoy someone, there's no point in writing.

Love is overrated, marry for money.

I like it! It was very well written! :) good job!

on Sep. 2 2011 at 6:10 pm
IamtheshyStargirl PLATINUM, Lothlorien, Utah
44 articles 16 photos 2206 comments

Favorite Quote:
Boredom instigates extreme creativity.

"Bowing gratefully to all of my subjects, 'thank you. Thank you. The pleasure is mine." Nah, I'm just kidding. We're all kings together.'"

Very good, this is beautifully unique.

on Aug. 10 2011 at 5:57 pm
HannSawyer15 BRONZE, North Brunswick, New Jersey
1 article 0 photos 107 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I say... lets speak it. Lets fight it. Lets write it. There's nothing to hold on to if it's already gone."

Wow! I really like this... it really pulled me in and made me want to keep reading. Great job!

on Aug. 4 2011 at 10:00 pm
Raytheraym PLATINUM, Belton, Missouri
47 articles 35 photos 457 comments
Wow! This is fantastic! Very well written! I really like it! :)

on Aug. 3 2011 at 7:44 pm
BrightBurningCampeador PLATINUM, Portland, Oregon
42 articles 11 photos 333 comments
Thanks! I actually wrote this in a language arts class free write. The prompt was "stuff that's broken".

on Aug. 2 2011 at 7:10 pm
JerseyGirl716 BRONZE, Central, New Jersey
2 articles 0 photos 92 comments

Favorite Quote:
"We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot." -Eleanor Roosevelt

Very, very powerfull. I like the message: that revenge is worthless, right? Don't fight fire with fire? You got that across in a really unique way, definitely not a cliche :) Great job!

on Jul. 30 2011 at 1:07 am
PaigeStreet PLATINUM, Juneau, Alaska
47 articles 0 photos 218 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Stay golden"
- Johnny (The Outsiders, S. E. Hinton)

Hm. Definitely an original juxtaposition of tone and subject. I like the idea. Maybe make some more? This could be a trademark style, for sure. 

on Jul. 28 2011 at 11:17 pm
b_gomez114 BRONZE, East Haven, Connecticut
3 articles 0 photos 7 comments
very well written..intriguing idea, and a smooth flow. keep it up

on Jul. 19 2011 at 1:09 pm
CieraDesiree GOLD, Hagerstown, Indiana
17 articles 1 photo 59 comments

Favorite Quote:
An eye for an eye only makes the whole world blind.
You never know what you have until it's gone.

This is really good. I love your writing style. It seems older in fashion. Very nice=)

on Jul. 5 2011 at 12:12 am
Garnet77 PLATINUM, Sinagpore, Other
31 articles 6 photos 577 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Everything's a triangle." ~ My mother

"Write what you love, write what you care about, because sometimes, it's the easiest way to be heard."

I really like this. A lot. The story is intriguing--it kind of made me wonder what was going on as I started, and your word choice was excellent. Good job!!! :)

on Jul. 1 2011 at 9:14 pm
freeflow23 GOLD, Durham, North Carolina
15 articles 0 photos 96 comments

Favorite Quote:
Saul saw Goliath as too big to kill. David saw he was too big to miss.

I liked the story you told with this poem. It was very thought provoking.

on Jul. 1 2011 at 7:56 pm
BrightBurningCampeador PLATINUM, Portland, Oregon
42 articles 11 photos 333 comments

on Jul. 1 2011 at 6:58 pm
willowwriter GOLD, Rogers, Arkansas
13 articles 0 photos 23 comments

Favorite Quote:
"no matter who you are, where you come from, or where you are going, you are always loved"

I like your writing style. It makes a person think. Good work. :)

.Izzy. BRONZE said...
on Jul. 1 2011 at 6:19 pm
.Izzy. BRONZE, Broadview Heights, Ohio
1 article 0 photos 388 comments
After I read this, the first thought that came to my mind was powerful. Very interesting concept. I don't really have any contrustive criticism for you, I like it how it is(: Good job!

on Jul. 1 2011 at 5:34 pm
TwasBrilling BRONZE, Staunton, Va, Virginia
4 articles 0 photos 79 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The owl of Minerva spreads its wings only with the falling of the dusk" -H.W. Hegel

"Words are our most inexhaustable source of magic' -Albus Dumbledore

I like this! It's great that you told a story with it...something I'm not very good at with poetry.

on Jul. 1 2011 at 5:04 pm
Silent_Artist SILVER, Selma, North Carolina
8 articles 0 photos 24 comments

Favorite Quote:
"One day I'm gonna run away and never come back and when I come back I'm gonna be the knife master" - Jimmy The Rev Sullivan. Not much of a deep meaning but it makes me laugh.

Really like this one :)

on Jun. 29 2011 at 2:06 pm
BrightBurningCampeador PLATINUM, Portland, Oregon
42 articles 11 photos 333 comments
Which poems are they? I looked you up on advance search, but nothing came up. Are they in the forums?

on Jun. 28 2011 at 1:18 pm
pill.happy.adventure PLATINUM, Manchester, New Hampshire
21 articles 3 photos 41 comments

I liked it! its really powerful. I love your thought prosses behind it!!

Could you maybe read one of my poems i dont care wich one you pick.

on Jun. 19 2011 at 7:28 pm
Alcanno DIAMOND, Mexia, Texas
59 articles 0 photos 670 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you love life, don't waste time, for time is what life is
made up of."

-- Bruce Lee

Haha. You should, its pretty short but extremely amazing. Ayn Rand wrote it after escaping a communist country - The book is SUPER powerful, I highly reccomend it :)