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the smell of rain will always remind me of him.
i’ve got a neon sign, my rain
 cloud, my won’t let me go hanging
 glaringly
 over my head;
 “this girl can’t commit” it says
 in angry red letters like numbers one and 2
 and failing scores.
 
 
 if internal scars did visible damage,
 i must be an old woman by now, limp
 skin hanging in folds, a grandmother’s
 coffee-splotched hands and knuckles
 protruding like saint helens
 after the blow.
 
 
 i held on to the flower he gave me-
 the pink one,
 that he threaded into my hair.
 but the petals dropped one
 by one, like dreams that loose their luster.
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