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Bottled Up
“What’s wrong bud?” my mom asked
“I feel sad all the time
“I don’t know how to control the sorrow in my head
“Or the anxiety in my body.”
“Do you want to see a doctor?” My mom asked
“No mom, it’s nothing they will be able to fix”
“All these feelings bottled up”
“A few more and the bottle might blow”
“I'm hiding all these feelings behind a mask”
“That I pray one day I can take off”
“Be able to feel free”
“Be able to be me again”
“But I can’t until I figure this out”
“I can’t until the past stops haunting me”
“Until the ghosts of past decisions go away”
“Until the doors to a new future open up”
“Until I can figure out a way”
“A way to open up to friends and family”
“Open up and not feel like I’m going to be made fun of”
“Or ignored”
“I want to be heard”
“I want to be able to tell someone”
“Tell someone without being treated differently”
“I don’t want to be treated like I’m some weirdo”
“Some weirdo with problems”
“Problems that I can’t control”
“I feel like if I try to tell people they will say”
“It will all be okay soon”
“But soon has yet to come!”
“It’s been 3 years since I’ve felt I belong somewhere”
“Somewhere I feel people understand me”
“Where people like me”
“Where people trust me”
“I just want it all to end”
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I wrote this poem because I feel like there are a lot of people that have to deal with this type of thing. If more people felt like they could tell someone about feelings they have “bottled up” then it can really change them. I used the terms “behind a mask” and “bottled up” because they are common ways to describe someone hiding their sadness or depression. If everyone had someone that they trusted wouldn’t make fun of them or just completely ignore them the world would be a lot different.