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And When He Looks Down
God almighty looks down on his creations
Pitiful and irrelevant
All stuck in their own delusions of a false sense of grandeur
An aunt pelted with the pearls of her wealth
Always amicable towards those she knows will serve her
Always bitter towards herself and those she deems unworthy
She despises those who lack her common sense
A child sitting in a desolate room.
Willing themselves to disappear
Trying to build a wall from the hail that falls cold and inevitable
Praying to him
“ Please let me not hear or feel”
Oh, to not have heard or felt
God laughs
A woman kisses her lover.
Tenderly brushes a smile across her lips
Stares into her hazelnut irises
Feeling for the first time in years
At peace
A mother looks towards the rear of her car
A newborn daughter sleeps
And the woman reminisces of when she first held her
She remembers the news of her baby girl’s health
6 months.
A man kisses his wife’s belly swollen like a rose hip
They sing sweet nothings
Dedicated to their future together
God smiles at his ignorant creations.
Or perhaps it was a sneer.
Or a grimace.
Perhaps pity.
A small boy’s eyes bug out
And his face flushes red
Veins pop with panic
And a friend performs the Heimlich maneuver
A piece of chicken escapes his throat
And alas he breathes again
A professor at a respected university
Is down on his knees begging for his forgiveness
He says he wants to repent
He says he’s a sinner
God says we are all sinners
Fiends made of neutrality
Shaped by our own experiments
We are no longer truly his creations
We have ascended to our own hell
No longer needing his punishment nor protection
He cannot forgive your sins anymore
For he too has ascended
To simply observe
He too is a fiend of neutrality
He too is a sinner
Poor professor doesn’t know that he is no worse
He cheated on Cathy
And she stole from him
And in God’s Earth all he knows is that every spine is capable of decay
All he knows is detachment from the sinners
From their comforts too
All God knows is repetition
And as the entertainment slowly fades
It becomes comical
And to make it worse they all think they’re the main character
They all think that they’re right
When in reality they’re lives don’t matter
None of it does
Existence is the one truly meaningless thing
Yet they still forge meaning where there is none
… and it is so funny
So illogical to have created this world that they shouldn’t have
So arrogant
So dimwitted …
That in all its depravity it is absolutely stunning.
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I struggle a lot with my mental health and it often leads to the question “What is the point of it all?” This poem is my exploration of that inquiry. I’d like to think that while there may be no meaning, that might just be the point. All that we know exists despite its supposed pointlessness and I can’t help but find comfort knowing that no matter what the only way to get anything out of this existence is through finding the joys it holds.