Pitter, Patter

Stale water cries from the sink

As little footsteps begin to creep. 

Lying there, 

Face white as snow. 

Was a mother most would not know. 

Floorboards creak,

Eyes snap open. 

Racing across the room 

air seems to freeze 

Your heart is mournful and dark,

No longer holding any light. 

Pill after pill, 

The more you take, 

The less you seem to fight. 

Your mind fills with an endless chutter, 

But the drugs make you feel warm, 

SHE gives you a loving caress, 

As your daughter waits for you to come home. 

Please tell me!

“What's the matter?” 

“Did I do something wrong?” 

“How do i do better?” 

A hardened outer shell, 

Inside left dangerously hollow. 

Pill after pill I watch you swallow. 

She sings to you, 

And so quickly you follow 

God, I wish I could hate you. 

But instead in my feelings I wallow.

Some people dont get a happy ending

Ive learned to accept that 

But damn.. 

When I stare at my swollen red eyes in the mirror, and feel so tired I can hardly breathe 

I cant help but think 

Why? 

Life seems so unfair. 

Ive seemed to reach the point of not caring.

And as sad as that may seem, 

Im as happy as can be 

For disappointment isnt a foreign feeling. 

I could never understand how “sober” was so unattainable, 

Throw away your life for a couple minutes of high? 

Impossible. 

But now, 

The greatest disappointment of all, 

Is turning into the person I grew up hating

Yet I still dont quite understand. 

Pill after pill.

I dont understand because, 

The memories,

The pain, 

And all your problems are still there, 

Waiting for you to relive them all over again. 

Today, tomorrow, and the day after.

Oh, how a daughter cries for a mother,

Wishing for one hug, 

One whisper, 

One caress. 

Pill after pill, 

Silly little girl who learned to hate herself, 

And loved those who didnt deserve it. 

Afraid that no matter what nothing will make her feel whole. 

That girl isnt coming back. 

But, you did not deserve what you went through, 

It did not change who you are, 

Or make you better or worse. 

You are who you are, 

Im sorry if it hurts.