How do you go about writing a poem about suicide?

How do you stand in front of people and explain  thoughts of drowning in a sea,

but not a sea others can see 

because it's all in your head

My head- is filled to the brink ready to pop.

Insecurities, anxiety, depression, 

Swirling around, spilling from the broken seams.

How do you go about writing a poem about suicide?

How do you explain to a crowd

That you almost didn’t make it through the lowest part of your life.

-blank stares- -concerned eyes- -gaping mouths-

When everything was equivalent to nothing.

When the scars you marked yourself with were the only things that made you feel

How do you go about writing a poem about suicide?

When words of, 

“People will miss you,”

“Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem,”

“It gets better,”

are shoved down your throat since we learned what the word ‘suicide’ meant

So often-

the words mean nothing now.

How do you go about writing a poem about suicide,

When the number is one million?

One million people-  lose their fight every year.

When facing your own thoughts, is more dangerous than a semi barrelling at you on a highway.

When swimming with blood thirsty sharks, seems easier than admitting you need help.

And when relaxing with a murderer, is better than being alone.

How do you go about writing a poem about suicide?

I still don't know.