All throughout my years in school, I have always been seen as different. 

Everyday when I walk into school, all I see are white faces. No face like mine is reflected back towards me. I am one of a kind in this snow cluttered school, the only mud blended stain that walks within the halls. 

Eyes would constantly lock on me from a day to day basis, the feelings of anxiousness would weigh down on my shoulders as people would sublimily point and stare at me. It was just the sheer, sly fact that I knew that their intentions were not friendly- their intentions were out of pure curiosity and ignorance. 

No matter what I do, I will always be seen as ‘The Black girl.’

‘Why me? Why are people always assuming what type of person I am based on my skin? Why do I have to be stuck with this burden that makes me feel so excluded and alone?’ 

Questions would ponder in my mind, specific questions that would bring a sick feeling to my stomach. From those questions and thoughts, I found myself in a deep, dark pit of nothingness- a void that was unexplainable and oh so detached from everyone and everything. 

I felt like an abandoned animal that was left on display for people to see. Somehow, I was their special entertainment.

I felt like I was nothing. 

It was not until a specific day in my sophomore year when two boys behind me started calling me racial slurs that I finally realized… People were never going to change. No matter what I say, do, act, wear- I will always be seen as ‘The Black Girl.’ If someone has hate in their heart, you cannot change them. At that moment I decided I had to change my perspective... I had to change my point of view. 

When I look back at the girl who I was, it brings sadness to heart knowing that I was so confused and closed minded about the world. I was so small then, so innocent and blinded by reality. In that same light when I remember those scenarios of hate, it makes me more confident, strong, powerful, independent, smart, and prideful.

I am no longer scared of being me for the simple fact that I am a minority in this White Man’s world. I am no longer paranoid and afraid of what people might assume about me, because you know what? 

I am ‘The Black Girl’ that walks down the hallways with power and confidence. 

I am ‘The Black Girl’ who thrives and is outspoken about her sexuality, race and body. 

I am ‘The Black Girl’ that will stand up for herself and stare prejudism right in the face, ready to retort back...

I am Kayla and I love me for me.