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An Experience
It's soul-destroying to second guess so much of you that nothing remains except saltwater in a cold shower. You rub in the soap, and your eyes water. You like this excuse. You scream and beg for tears, but your eyes remain dry as if like a judgment. You force out breaths and rock yourself to sleep even though every night brings the same nightmares. You blame yourself, and guilt chokes you until you are gasping. It does not let go even then. You are convicted in your court and look forward to sweet damnation as a desperate release.

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Sometimes. the people closest to us decide to desert us. Inevitably, we blame ourselves for their desertion.