At the moment I can’t feel.

I can’t see

I can’t hear

Anything from thing and everything from outside

Is gone.

All that is left is the screaming girl

Curled up in the fetal position waiting for someone to save her.

Her scream for help can not be heard by people

Her tears can not be seem

Her smile can no longer be found.

She has given up.

If she were not scared of what happens next

She would be dead.

Her brain betrays her every waking moment.

It always makes her wants to die

Even if her heart does not want to, yet.

She tries to find help

But every time she tries to talk about it 

Her own mouth changes what is said.

Her whole body betrays her.

She tries and tries to show and say what it is like to live with her brain

Yet they beat her and change what comes out.

Only her broken heart lets her feel what she wants.

Suffering,

Loneliness,

Evil,

Dead,

No matter what meds she takes

Or who she talks to 

It will always end the same.

Her brain and heart agree that she is nothing but another fallen soldier.

In a war many die.

They say go out with a fight.

Yet with her, every breath is her fighting.

Every heartbeat is her showing she wants to live!

Yet the war inside is too strong

The war inside is her first and last war she will fight

It will only go on 

And make her suffer.

So she meets the decision.

She fears death yet her brain does not.

She wants to live yet her heart has had enough.

She is left with only one thought

The heroes always die fighting while the enemy lives to suffer.

So the real question is what is she?

She no longer wants to fight.

Every hero has died.

So she now understands her role

She is the villain

The reason why heroes suffer

The reason people around her are unhappy

The reason she suffers

The reason people are happy without her

Is all because she is the villain that destroys happiness

To try to make herself the happy one.

Yet no matter how many people she takes down with her

She is never happy inside...