my friday nights are usually spent inside

curled up next to my cat on the couch

browsing through netflix or hulu

or endlessly scrolling through instagram

but i was persuaded to come out

and party the night away

i should have declined

i didn’t want to go out

to waste away a night drinking

only to throw it up in three hours

i don’t want to come home smelling like

smoke and teenage desperation

i remember spotting you across the room

a stupid boyish grin plastered on

your cruel two fingers beckoned to me

despite the tingling in the back of my neck

and the lump in my throat

i followed you into the dark bathroom

i should have said no

but the thing is i did

seven times i screamed it 

into the hollow wasted abyss of your face

void of any human emotion

as you decided to pin me down

you called me the wh**e 

after tearing apart my body 

like a rabid, viscious beast

not a drop of remorse in your sweat

but a whole ocean of regret in the tear

that rolled down my cheek.

i spent the next day in the shower

trying to scrape your smell off of my skin

hoping to cleanse my soul of your sins

all i got was a feeling of emptiness

and bright red streaks down my body

at least i can't tell which ones you carved

not only did you strip me

down to my lacy blue underwear

but of my blissful innocence 

never again will i venture outside

of my safety net on my couch 

never again will i trust another man