The twisting of reality

Leaves me to wonder

What is the true me

The girl or the mask she hides behind

I’m always pushing, never pulling

Never had a way of knowing

If I was falling

I don’t have the courage or

The words

To make them understand

I want to stand

But the fear of falling

Keeps pulling me down

And the masquerade goes on

Never knowing if I can trust

Those around me

that hide their face

With an ornate mask

But it’s so worn

It’s cracking with

Their essence peeking through

How do I break through the

One way glass

How do I understand this buzzing

This humming

This pounding in my skull

A girl

Screaming SOS

And no one hears her

And so the masquerade goes on

And how long will I be trapped

In this abandoned ballroom

Wearing this dress

And the mask that has never been me?

And I can’t help anything

In this dark maze

Of mirrors

Trying to escape

I wish I could be the performer

The loud one

The one who rushes

Into the heat of battle

Without a single thought

Of concern or doubt

Trusting in my blood

I deserve to see myself

In the role of the hero

Instead of a side character

That gets one line

And then is forgotten

By the world the performers create

And the world outside the stage.

But instead I still feel trapped

By this small talk

These walls

That keep me locked inside

Away from the life

I’ve always wanted

To live

And I’m terrified

Trying to find a way out

But no one knows what goes on inside my head

And a sense of dread

Settles over me as I realize

I might be trapped here forever

Unless I can find a ladder

Or an angel

Who will come and pull me

Out of the hole

I’ve created in my head

While the masquerade goes on