Excited, 

But nervous.

Shaking like a jack-hammer.

Nervous from the tips of my toes to the ends of my hair.

Nervous inside my head,

But not my heart.

My heart was excited and happy,

A fluttering butterfly.

I could taste the dressing from the salad I had eaten before.

I could see how many people were watching.

I could hear their laughter in the middle of it all.

I could feel the weight of the emptiness surrounding me.

It felt loud,

Louder than it should have been.

But my heart was brave,

It compelled me.

My heart was fearless.

That’s what got me up there.

That’ what made me start.

That’s what made me keep going, no matter what.

That’s what made me wait to cry,

Wait until I was in the bathroom.

But I did what I set out to do.

Because of my hopes,

My dreams,

My joys.

Because of my heart,

I got to see how far I’ll go.